Guilty Pleasures

[Guinevère]

When Arthur spoke and eased each one of her fears she was grateful that he knew her well enough to make sure that all her fears were eased! Then he spoke was the war, and Guinevère's face grew both surprised and weighted. "Is it over?" She didn't mean the war but Odin's hate. They had won but would it end here, or was this just the first wave of hate.

She looked up at the plate when he put it before her. "I will. I just needed to see them, and hold Anna......you." which brought her to another question, "Can you come tonight? Or I to you?" It was asked in a low voice, but she needed to know if they could talk later. To be together.

[Arthur Pendragon]

She asked if it was over and all Arthur could do was pray that it was. "For now," he answered, wishing he could say the same for Morgana's wrath. "We are currently under negotiations to determine some sort of truce." One that would end this bloodshed, even though he wanted nothing more than to kill Odin for killing his father, Elena, and kidnapping Thomas . . . just to name a few things. She said that she would eat, but not just yet. He understood that, of course he did. She must be beside herself with worry, still needed time to be reassured that everything was truly alright.

He smiled at her question, knowing that there was no point of hiding anything anymore. "I have no intention of leaving you or the children tonight. I thought that we could all remain in this room." The bed was big enough for Guinevère and the children, since Arthur knew he would not be sleeping tonight. Too much had to be done, and so he wanted to take advantage of the time when everyone was awake. Them being the same room, was more comfort for Guinevère. "That is if Thomas doesn't want his own room," Arthur said, asking the young boy what he preferred since he was a bit older, but had also been through quite a bit.

[Guinevère]

A truce. Meaning it was not over, and would not be until Odin was dead. Guinevère looked down at Anna for a moment, thinking of all the danger her sons had been put in. Though she smiled when he offered to let them all stay in this room. While it wasn't hers or his, it was someplace they could be together.

Thomas jumped up at Arthur's suggestion. "Really?!" He asked, excited, while Guinevère felt her heart skip. She wondered if it was safe, but knew she could not mother hen him. Arthur would make sure he was well guarded. Of that she was sure. She had to be the brave one now. "I think it sounds wonderful." She said softly, smiling at Arthur and Thomas.

[Arthur Pendragon]

"Good," Arthur said smiling, glad she agreed. With everything that had happened, he wanted them inside the castle. And with it now being known knowledge that the king had not one but two children . . . there was heavy security around them and the castle in general. There would be the aftermath to deal with, and a great deal to explain. But right now, he was just focusing on his family. Letting his mind continue to lay at rest that they were all safe and sound, unharmed and well. Things had almost come to the exact opposite of that . . . but in the end, it all worked out. An that was what he needed to focus on. "Gaius said that Anna will be fine," he began to tell Guinevère.

"She will have to take some medicine and will remain weak for a little while, but there will be no lasting effects." On her very premature birth. Arthur had not thought he was going to make it in time, and he had. Thank goodness. For if he and Merlin had been even a moment too late, she would not have survived. Arthur wondered if Merlin had the power to save his other children, which only made Arthur wish he had known sooner. Yet at the same time, Anna had still technically been alive when Merlin used his magic on her. He knew he would have to make a decision about magic, his mind already knowing what that would be. And at some point, he would have to explain it all to Guinevère. Though under the circumstances of how Merlin's magic was revealed and what he had done in his reveal, Arthur doubted Guinevère would object to Arthur's welcoming of magic.

[Guinevère]

Arthur spoke of Anna and Gaius and she felt grateful that he had taken Anna to him. She wanted to ask more, but she would wait until they were more alone then this, so that they would not have to watch their words as much. Looking down at Anna, Guinevère pulled her closer to her lips, and kissed her, before just inhaling the scent of baby that Anna would smell like for a while. Her dear sweet daughter. When she lifted her head she smiled softly over at Arthur. "She is so beautiful!" Her voice was just as soft as her smile, one of happiness, but slight overwhelming.

Thomas got up and came over, climbing up so he sat on the table, but sitting before Guinevère. "Can I hold her?" He asked, and Guinevère moved forward slightly, her breath catching when her muscles hurt, and passed Anna to her brother. Her hands stayed there, resting on Thomas' legs just in case, but she let him take all of Anna's weight. "She is so small!" He exclaimed, looking at his sister. "She s very small." Guinevère agreed, as Thomas looked down at the babe. When he looked up, his face moved around to look at Arthur for a moment, before back at Anna.

"What are you thinking so hard about?" She asked her eldest son. He looked up at her, passing Anna back to Guinevère, who sat back in the chair. "That if I get my own room, Anna can have mine." Guinevère paused for a moment before laughing softly, and it turning to a slightly bigger laugh. Out of all troubles in the world, that was Thomas' greatest at the moment. One that was simple enough to give him.

Thomas got down and ran to Arthur, questioning him about getting his own chambers, while Guinevère reached for the plate and finally took a few bites. Their they spent the rest of the after just being together, Until Guinevère went to lay back down. She did not sleep but just rested with Anna with her, knowing once Arthur got the boys settled he would join her.

When he did join her, she had just finished feed Anna, and was rocking her to sleep, singling the same soft song that she had sun to Thomas and later Amaren. At the sound of his steps she looked up, "Hullo," She greeted, knowing every conversation had to begin with a hello.

[Arthur Pendragon]

The rest of the evening went splendidly. Everything was calm and relaxed -- well, as relaxed as it could be with a new born baby, a two other boys. Arthur helped Thomas get settled into his own room, one which joined to this one through a door. Arthur ensured that it was heavily guarded and that the windows were secure. He left the door between the rooms so that Thomas would not feel isolated, but the boy seemed to be tired and it didn't take long for him to fall asleep. Amaren on the other hand was a bit more hyper and it took a little while longer to settle him into his crib, telling a story to help him sleep -- which proved to be rather effective.

Making sure he was asleep, Arthur just watched him for a few moments, feeling that constant wave of relief that washed over him in the knowledge that his son -- all of them -- were safe and sound. He kissed Amaren on the top of his head, then directing his attention to Guinevère and their newest baby.He smiled as he approached them, kicking off his boots and lying next to her. He watched Anna for a few moments, taking in how beautiful she was . . . how small and precious she was. "She really is beautiful," Arthur said, thinking aloud. He knew he had said these words before, but really could not say them enough.

[Guinevère]

Guinevère smiled at his words, and passed Anna over to her father, since she had taken her from him hours ago and not returned her. "Do you remember, when we used to speak of her as if she was nothing but an imposable dream?" Guinevère did, in the moment after they had come together, when they both knew it could never happen again . . . . they would speak of a daughter. Of Anna. And now she was real.

But so where the dangers, and the uncertainty. Anna had a small head of dark black hair, that for the moment was thin and straight, but Guinevère knew in a new months it would change. Her eyes were also blue, but they took would change, as her brother's did before her.

Moving to sit up better, and sideways so she could lead on the headboard and face Arthur while they spoke. "So much has happened in just a few days . . . I am not sure where to even begin." Morgana. The castle. Thomas' being injured, Amaren's kidnapping, Anna's birth. All three of the children but at risk. She supposed the best place to start was the one that was unsloved, or over now. "In the letters you left Arthur, you said that if I did not wish to let it be known who Amaren's father was, I should not give them to him. I want you to know that I would have--still would like to when he is older." But it was already known who he was now. Her voice faded to an unsure whisper as she spoke the last part, "Everyone knows now."

[Arthur Pendragon]

Arthur held Anna, keeping her close to him. She was so tiny, he wanted to make sure she had enough support under her head, so he kept her close to his chest, looking down at her, unable to stop looking at her. He listened to Guinevère reminisce about when they had only spoken of Anna as an impossibility. He remembered that quite well. The second time they had made love, he had told her he had no right . . . and then they had both dreamed of a little girl. Who knew that she would bless him with a son first and then a daughter. She went on to speak of how so much had happened, and he silently reflected on it . . . thinking of it all. Of how everything spiraled out of their control. The letters. His mind thought to them and now hearing that Guinevère would have given him the letters, that she would have told Amaren.

Arthur looked at her, unsure what expression was in his eyes. It meant everything to him that she would, and yet he wondered if he had pressured her to make that decision. "Everyone knows now." That they did. Neither he or Guinevère had the power to reveal it how they wanted to, under their own controlled circumstances. "I know," he said softly, looking at Anna, realizing how much danger it placed Guinevère and the children in. "I'm sorry," he added. It were his enemies -- his own sister -- that was targeting them. "You were right, in what you said before." About how she did not want him to claim Amaren because of how his children would be used against him. A price that they would all have to pay. "Which is why I would have understood if you wished to withhold the letters from Amaren." Even though she said that she would not have.

"With all that has happened . . . we need to start thinking on what is best for the children. What is best for you." How to best take care of them and make sure they were guarded. "I can better protect you all if you were to remain in the castle." It wasn't just for selfish purposes, but with word out that he had two children . . . it was too risky for her to remain at another estate. And he would obviously never separate her from the children. That was not an option. He turned to Guinevère, pausing before continuing to speak. "And if I were to make you queen." His wife. Queen of Camelot. He knew it was soon, of course he knew that. Elena had died not too long ago. But, in order to protect them and her as well as the children's reputation . . . this may be easiest. As queen, she would be well guarded and her safety as well as Thomas, Amaren's and Anna's, less compromised.

[Guinevère]

"You were right, in what you said before." No, she was not. She knew she was not, and that her words had gone too close to his hear that day, even though they were not the ones she had meant. She had tried to use the dangers as a way to show they needed to be careful, but not one to mean they should never had had children, as he had taken it that day. So many words spoken on that very day still hunted them. Apart of her knew they always would.

She knew that many were spoken in anger and fear, but at the time they had both meant them. He only had changed his mind, after her own words had dug into his heart. "I can better protect you all if you were to remain in the castle." "I do not have any plans to leave." She knew where she was safe, and most importantly, where the children were safe at. This was were Arthur was. Where else would she be?

His next words caused her to pause a moment, and feel both a form of joy at the idea of being his wife, and fear at the idea of being anyone's queen--and heartbreak that the choice had been taken from them. "And if I were to make you queen." It was not a question, nor romantic proposal. A part of her did not even expect one at this point, because she knew that none of this was what he had wanted--at least not this soon. He was a man of honor and pride, and she had cost him both by forcing them to lie in a lie that they both knew could not be up held. He was paying the price now for her decisions.

Guinevère was aware of his words, if he were to make her queen. Not when I make you my wife. Reaching out she rested her hand on Anna's head, letting her thumb brush her small little cheek. "I love you, Arthur." She reminded him, "The last time we were forced to make a choice that defined our lives, I gave you no choice. Listened to nothing you had to say. This time I will trust you, as I should have done then. Had I done so then perhaps Amaren were never have been at risk. Even Anna better protected. I was not right in what I said before. You are a good man, and a better father then either of our own." And she had high standards because her own father had been so wonderful! "This time I will help you, do what you feel is best." She moved to kiss his cheek, then rest her head on his shoulder, while watching Anna just breath and sleep.

[Arthur Pendragon]

Arthur thought about her words, knowing that she expressed no agreement but rather said that she trusted him to do what was best. "I don't know what that is anymore," he admitted. He had lost his honor, caused the death of Elena, risked Guinevère's life, along with risking Thomas, Amaren and Anna's . . . he had a council filled with men who had no idea what to say to him, Godwyn who was ill, Odin who would probably not honor a truce, Merlin who was a sorcerer, and a half sister out there who was out for his and any other Pendragon blood she could take. Arthur had no idea what was best. How did he protect everyone? How did he make sure everyone stayed safe? He not only had an entire kingdom to think of, but his family.

"You had said before that you were worried about the reputation of the children. And then there is your own." That was just one of the ways he wanted to . . . needed to protect them."I don't know what else to do," he admitted, in a defeated voice. Looking at Anna, brought him so much peace and yet, his mind could not rest with everything going on. He wanted to legalize magic, and yet knew the uprise that would cause. He wanted to marry Guinevère, and yet knew the aftermath could be very well the same as it was in legalizing magic. "This is not something that is only my decision. It is yours too." He was not going to make such a grand decision over something that effected them both, and would affect the children too. It was their decision to make.

[Guinevère]

She still worried for their reputations, and it hurt to know the very words she was fearful people would use could be being used in this moment already. "Arthur you should, as always, follow you heart. Your men love you. Your people respect you. They do this because they know you, and have come to see what sort of man you are every time they are faced with trouble. Other then Morgana, and the few who she has convinced with lies, none of your people would see anyone else as their king."

"Do you want to marry me?" She asked, but then realize how that sounded, "I mean---I know you love me, but I meant now." So soon after he had lost a wife, and been faced with a war. She knew he wanted to wed her, and wanted to be with her but she also knew the timing was so very wrong. Either way, he would be claiming his children. They could do their best to protect them in every way. If he needed time, however, she would give him that.

[Arthur Pendragon]

She told him to follow his heart and he wished he had taken her advice sooner. He wished he had done so before he married Elena, so that none of this would have ever happened. With following his heart, he had risked so much. And at the same time, could not regret his time with her, and the two beautiful children they created together. He wasn't sure what this made him, or how it affected others perceptions of him. He only knew that he loved her, Thomas, Amaren and Anna . . . and wanted to do whatever was best for them. He wasn't sure if they would regard him so highly knowing he had betrayed Elena. She was not a horrible queen, not in the slightest. She was an incredible woman, and at the same time . . . his heart always knew Guinevère would have fit the role of queen -- and his wife -- perfectly.

Far better than anyone else could. Her question caught him slightly off guard as he looked at her, inquiring whether he wanted to marry her. "I do," he answered, not having to think about it. "I know the timing is far from ideal but, after what happened . . . I can not bare the thought of losing you or the children." He knew he had planned to marry her when he returned, but he had not expected it to be this soon, and yet . . . he felt as if they had no other choice. He turned his gaze from Anna, and looked at Guinevère, wanting to be sure that she believed him when he said that he wanted to marry her. "I know that this is not how we planned it but . . . " he suddenly, and carefully, passed Anna to Guinevère and shifted the side of the bed, where he opened his safe and pulled out a small cloth.

In it, was his mother's ring. He had not given it to Elena, for he had been saving it . . . even for something he had believed was impossible. He then moved to the other side of the bed, where Guinevère was and knelt down on one knee, looking up at her. "Guinevère . . . " he began, a soft smile playing on his lips as he held up the ring. "Would you do me the honor, of becoming my wife?" He didn't know when they would be married, or if they would decide to prolong the engagement. He just knew that this was the promise he had spoken of and even if there was pressure, ultimately, the decision was hers, and he wanted her to have the freedom to decide for herself.

[Guinevère]

"I know that this is not how we planned it but . . . " Had anything in their lives? They had once planned on waiting for each other, then he married another, and she another, then they began an affair, and had children, and so much had happened that neither of them wanted, or planned for. While she regretted many things, their children were not among her regrets. "We can plan better now, we can be more ready." She told him as he got out of bed, and got something before walking around to her side of the bed.

She rested Anna back on the center of the mattress, and rested one hand over her small frame. Guinevère's palm and fingers almost covered Anna' whole chest and belly. "Guinevère . . . " Turning she looked at Arthur, her lips parting in surprise. She knew that ring. Had seen it before in times when he had spoken about his mother to her. "Would you do me the honor, of becoming my wife?" Tears came to her eyes, and she blinked them back, only being able to stare at the ring, then his face. Too emotional for even words!

His wife! He wanted her to marry him, and while she knew it there was a different between knowing it and him asking! She moved forward to hug him, and then pulled back to smile at him. "Yes!" She would wait for him, and marry him, and love him. "I love you."

[Arthur Pendragon]

Arthur smiled as she accepted his proposal, feeling a wave of relief wash over him. He did not know what was going to happen, when they could get married or . . . well, anything else for that matter. But he did not think of these things as he slipped the ring onto her finger. All he focused on were the words she said to him. "I love you." For that was all that seemed to matter right now. The last time he had gotten married, it was not what he wanted and if he had acknowledged that then . . . so many lives would be different. Elena would still be alive. Perhaps Lancelot too. Yet, Thomas would not be and so how could he dwell on the past when what was done was done. He wanted to look to the future and find what happiness they could in each other. He raised the back of her hand to his lips, lightly kissing it.

"I love you too," he said in a soft voice, wishing for so many things to be different. And yet, at the same time, with Anna, Amaren and Thomas in their lives . . . things felt perfect too. An odd contradiction, but one that he willingly embraced. "And I do not want to waste another moment without you." No longer did he want to leave her waiting without a solid commitment. No longer did he want to wonder day to day what would happen . . . whether they could be together or not. How they would be together. He wanted to make it happen. With Elena's passing that was now several months ago, he knew that he would have to explain a great deal to a select few -- Godwyn included -- but so much was now revealed for recent events had forced the truth out, so there was no need to hide any longer..