Passing The Torch (Arthur and Uther)

[kinguthersqueen]

Uther had know this day had to come, that Arthur had to assume power for now. Still, it was a day with a mixture of feelings for the king. He was naturally happy to be celebrating the prince's birthday, and there was a sense of pride at seeing his son take the throne,something he had never imagined he'd see, but there was a sadness as well.

Uther was a warrior, a man who lived and died to fight. He feared spending the rest of his days useless and powerless, a figurehead, king in name only. He had long hated the thought of dying like this, a sort of living dead man in his own mind. He desperately hoped this was only a temporary thing, that one day he would be strong enough to retake the throne. He knew he had to do what was best for Camelot, but that did not make all of the sadness go away.

Uther wished that he knew better what to tell his son as he prepared for the coronation. He himself had not had any such way of being advised when he had taken the throne years ago. His own father had paid a visit, king to king, after the coronation, but he still had not had any official preparation or wise words of advice before being crowned. He was not completely sure what to say to his own son now.

He recalled his own nervousness and wondered if Arthur felt the same way as they prepared to talk before the ceremony.

[Arthur Pendragon]

The day was an extremely hectic one. From the morning until now -- whatever time it was for Arthur had lost track of it -- he had not sat down. He had not stopped moving for there were so many preparations that needed to be done, so many things that needed to be set in place . . . and without Guinevère, Arthur was not sure how it would have all gotten done. It had been her who convinced him to wait a few days so that the coronation could be something planned and enjoyed for all to celebrate. He had been hesitant but she managed to convince him, and now here they were . . . getting ready for the big day, which also happened to conveniently fall on his birthday. This was the occasion that he would draw less attention to for he did not like this day. Only because it was the anniversary of his mother's death and he could never see this as cause for celebration. So while some would wish him happy birthday, he would politely thank them and move on.

That was not the main focus. The main focus was him becoming king. This left Arthur conflicted, but not enough to the point of debating whether he should do this or not. He knew he needed to, it was what the kingdom needed. At the same time, he knew what his was to his father. He and his father were not on the best terms. After having lied about Morgana, and then attacking Guinevère, Arthur was feeling more and more tension between them. He knew he had not been in his right mind, but how could he so easily look past seeing his father nearly kill the woman that he loved? It had been a horrific sight for his eyes to see and he was not sure he could ever trust his father in Guinevère's presence. The issue of Morgana had been something they'd somewhat discussed before, but it was still unresolved. Meaning, he still had not quite forgiven his father for that. The attack on Guinevère -- though not excused not forgiven -- had its reasons. But he had lied about Morgana for years and he could not blame his insane and fragile mind on a lie that he carried on for over twenty years.

So to say that everything was well an comfortable between the father and son would be a lie. Never the less, he was on his way to seeing him, knowing he wanted to speak to him before the coronation. Arthur had only just finished getting ready for the event that would take place in a few hours. He was clad in his very formal, royal attire which consisted of well polished chainmail and boots, and his vibrant red cape that held the Pendragon seal. He was unsure of how his father was going to react to all of this, and quite frankly, he was afraid. For he was not certain of how much more stress his already delicate mind and fragile state could endure. Regardless, he knew his father would be present at the ceremony. While him becoming king had come at a price, he was glad it was not the price of his father's life. He knocked a couple of times on the door to his father's chambers before just entering. "Father," he greeted, looking at him, trying to get a sense of how he felt on this inevitable day.

[kinguthersqueen]

Uther's mix of emotions continued to swirl as he watched Arthur enter in his formal attire. He had vowed to try and be happy for his son, to be proud of what he was about to do, but he could not hide the real truth from his eyes. The one consoling factor was that if his health did not fail him, he would, in time, be strong enough to be king again. He would not give up until his dying breath, but for now, he would be pleased for Arthur and for Camelot.

"This is not an easy day for me, but I know that we must do what is best for Camelot. I hope that the day will come when I am strong enough to once again become full leader of Camelot, but until then, I now that you will rule her well. I will do my best to let you make your decisions, but I hope that if you feel the need, you will not hesitate to seek my advice.

"I have long imagined the day you would become king, but I believed I would be dead when it happened. It is a difficult day for me, but I am certainly proud as well. I know that you have learned well, and that Camelot could ask for no better king."

[Arthur Pendragon]

Arthur listened quietly and attentively as his father spoke. Firstly, he talked about how difficult this was for him. That was understandable; he knew his father had conquered this kingdom, and he could imagine it was not easy to watch his son take control over it while he still drew breath. But still; Arthur did not regret his decision to take control. Camelot needed rational leadership, and the fact that his father accepted that -- and that he was currently unfit to rule -- had made this transition of kings a rather smooth one. He then spoke of how he hoped he would seek his advice if need be. Arthur was in silent disagreement of this. He did not see himself going to his father to seek advice . . . mostly because he lost a great deal of trust in him. Of course, Arthur could not deny that there was still a semblance of comfort in hearing his offer, even if the soon to be king had no immediate plans of taking him up on it.

"I wish it had not come to this," Arthur began to say, keeping the emotion from his tone, though it was there in his heart. He wished his father had not lied to him about Morgana. He wished Morgana had not felt bitter and betrayed everyone. He wished . . . they could just go back to the way things were. When it was the three of them, happy. Having their occasional disagreements but nothing along the lines of . . . well, of what it had become now. There were so many things that Arthur wished could have been different, but dwelling in the past was not a good way to take a step into the future. "But it has," he concluded pushing these thoughts out of his mind. "And we may hope that things would have been different, but the past can not be changed." Arthur knew they were not words of forgiveness. He knew that he was not thanking his father for his faith in him. He knew he was keeping an emotional distance with him. But it could not be helped. There were too many lies; too much betrayal.

[kinguthersqueen]

The way Arthur spoke and the silent language of his posture and carriage told Uther much that wasn't said in words. However, it was what was already obvious, the tension and distrust. Uther held to the hope that while he lived, he would be able to somehow repair the distance created between himself and his son, that something would not happen to estrange Arthur from him forever. However, he knew that things would never quite be the same as they had always been. They could not be, after what had been discovered. And he did not expect Arthur to ever clearly understand.

"As do I. There are things that should not have happened, and things that I would desire to change were it possible. But no man can change the past...I can only hope that the future can be better than the past. That something can be done to prevent further distance between us."

But even as he spoke, he knew that there was also a chance things could get worse, that Arthur could learn his final secret, the one he had sworn never to reveal. He still lived in dread fear of that happening, and clung to the hope it would not.