Death Couldn't Take Him (Merlin and Hunith)

[Deleted]

She had lost track of time as she lay here, part of her wanting to fight, the other part wishing it would end. She had faith that if anyone could rectify what had happened, it was Merlin, but she grieved for the price he would likely pay-his own life for hers. And if by some miracle he returned, it would mean it had been Gaius who had given his life.

Even now, she couldn't help feeling proud and honored for having brought Merlin into the world. She herself would not be remembered for long, but she knew inside that somehow, as she had always known, that her son would be great and that was enough for her. She would not have asked for anything more in her life.

She knew quickly that something was different, something had changed. The lesions on her skin were vanishing, and her breathing became easier. She no longer felt so weak and hot with fever. Part of her felt joyful, but she also did not try to hold back the tears, grieving for the son she believed must be dead now. Even with Gaius having gone, she believed it had to be Merlin's doing, that he had given his life for her.

"My brave boy...I know I shall see you again one day..."

(after Le Morte De Arthur, season 1)

[em]

He’d killed her. It was amazing what a thunderbolt and a bit of rain could do when coming up against the enemy. Nimueh had thought she’d killed him when she sent the ball of fire tumbling into his chest, but he’d come back stronger – for Gauis and for his mother.

He’d managed to help Gauis back from the Isle of the Blessed, thankfully he’d put the old man on his horse, so as to regain his strength whilst Merlin himself walked and led the horse and Gauis back to Camelot. He messed up everything but thankfully he’d righted all his wrongs. He knew that he should have listened and not bargained, but there always had to be a loophole to these things didn’t there? Merlin had found that out the hard way.

On their arrival back in Camelot, Merlin helped Gauis up to the physician’s quarters. He had to know how his mother was; hopefully she would be recovering by now. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing her – not for anything, and he made a mental note to himself not to bargain again, unless he knew the true price that he was paying.
Settling Gauis down, Merlin then ventured up to his room where his mother had been put and peered around the door – he didn’t want to wake her if she was sleeping. Upon seeing her, Merlin noticed that she looked much better than before he’d left (which was obvious considering she had been incredibly ill and Nimueh’s life had compensated for Gauis’).

“Mother?” he murmured and shot her a small grin. Thank goodness she was ok!

[Deleted]

She was still partly asleep, but the noise of Merlin coming in did wake her up a little more. Part of her expected that it would be Gaius, but she really did not know what to expect. She heard them moving about and speaking softly, and realized that there were two people who had come in. It was hard to tell for certain if it was both of them because they were speaking softly so they didn't disturb her.

Things grew slightly quieter for a bit, and then she was able to make out the outline of what seemed to be Merlin peering around the door. He confirmed it when he spoke, and she couldn't hold back a mixture of joy and surprise in the tired smile she returned.

"Merlin...you came back...I can hardly believe it...but how?"she asked.

[em]

“It’s a long story” Merlin replied, coming in and sitting down on the chair next to the bed.
He took her hand in his and squeezed it, “Everything’s alright – I promise you,” he told her.

Seeing her just lying there, Merlin felt the guilt start to come to him properly. All because of him – he’d almost lost her and Arthur because of his stupid bargains. “Im sorry…” he bit his lip, trying to hold back a few tears that he could feel pricking at the back of his eyes. “I try to help and yet I always make it worse. It’s my fault you’re here now”. He told her.

He paused before carrying on. “I always think im doing what’s best…for you, for me…for Arthur – but it isn’t. I always end up doing it wrong and people like you get hurt.” He admitted to her, “I almost lost Gauis back there too…” his voice had become so small that he could hardly even hear himself.
Merlin stroked the top of her hand. No matter how much relief he’d had earlier at the fact that he’d defeated Nimueh – only now was he realising that the choices he made were either going to hurt those close to him, or backfire very quickly.

Notes: Ok this is very OOC for Merlin