Better To Have Loved And Lost!!! {!!!}

[Sir Kolby]

Kobly for once, wasn't in the mood to be dashingly charming and wittily on cue. Today he was int he mood to--Hey! That flower would look on him! Walking past the servant's carrying the flowers away he plucked one out and tucked it in this shirt. The white flower hung there for a moment. He heard what happen. Hell he'd been in the room as they drug her in, before Arthur dismissed them all.

Kobly walked into the throne room, took one look at the king, and pulled the flower out to toss it on the ground a bit guilty. Kobly and Arthur went way back, he having started to train the boy until he learned to fight back. Walking up to the king, Kolby looked one way, and then the other before learning forward to Arthur, "Is this a good time to ask you for a favor?" He leaned back and looked at him for a moment, "No, I don't think so. You look a bit serious." He tilted his head one way and then the other. Reaching out to rest his hand on Arthur's shoulder he himself grew serious for a moment, "I might not have approved, but I didn't want it to end this way."

[Arthur Pendragon]

Arthur was staring, but wasn't really looking. This was not how today was supposed to be. It was supposed to start with him walking down the aisle. And then, Guinevère, with perhaps Elyan on her arm. Leading her down, towards him. Then, they would speak vows of spending the rest of their life together, committing themselves to each other. As man and woman; husband and wife; king and queen. Then tonight, he would take her to what was to become their chambers. And show her how much he loved her. They had plans. Plans that were as detailed to how she wished to change his chambers to make it less masculine as more comfortable, to general plans of how many children they wanted, and even having names all picked out. They had been waiting for this day for so many years. Ever since he fell in love with her, he had wanted her to become his wife. And that day had been within their grasp. That day would have been today.

But nothing, could have gone more wrong. They were not getting married. In fact, they were no longer together. She was gone because Arthur had banished her from Camelot. He felt his heart shatter when he did so, when he yelled at her, when he questioned her love for him . . . when he saw her kiss another on the eve of their wedding. It was too painful to bring to words, and would forever torment his mind, body, heart, and soul. He still loved her, more than anything. But he could not be with her. And this time, it was not because of ranks. It was not because of his father. It was not because of traditions. It was because, she had betrayed him. The word even in his mind sounded so bitter and so, unlike Guinevère. Yet he had witnessed it with his own eyes. And there was no denying it, no way around it. Suddenly a voice broke him out of this trance. A voice that he recognized and one that he did not wish to hear right now.

Though, much to his surprise, the man put a hand on his shoulder and gave him words of support. Arthur didn't want sympathy. He didn't want to hear others say they were sorry. He was sorry. For being such a fool and so naive to believe that he had found his happy ending. Because the one thing, the only thing that brought him so much joy, was Guinevère. She was what had gotten him through this past year or so, with Morgana's betrayal and his father's death. And now, she was no longer in his life. He looked at Kolby with no emotion, as his own arms remained at his sides, having watched all the flowers being dragged away. "What is it Sir Kolby?" He asked, not having been deaf to the question of a favor. He needed to focus on being king. No anyone's husband, fiance, or lover. He was incapable of being a husband, being a brother, being a son. So all he could do, was be a king. And even then, he hardly felt like he was doing a good job half the time.

[Sir Kolby]

It was going to be one of them conversations. One women were better at. Arthur needed a woman! One faithful to coin not to a pretty face. "I did not want a favor, I was trying to break that ice." He looked at Arthur, "You know. That ice around your face. You look frozen." It was joke. A very, very bad joke. "haha?" No, this wasn't going to work.

"Ok, I am done. I will be serious." HA! "In truth, I wanted to see how you were. I wanted to let you know I approve with how you handled everything. I didn't want see a woman die, no matter what your uncle wanted. Nasty business killing women. This way no one get hurts further." He was trying to help. "if you want to beat the hell out of someone, I can hold Merlin down. If you want someone to beat the hell out of you then I am here!" Kolby could not best him any longer but he was trying to be funny. WAIT! He was supposed to be trying to be serious. THAT lasted.

[Arthur Pendragon]

He didn't want a favor? Arthur was only half listening to Kolby's talking. He and Gwaine were a perfect match for neither of them ceased talking, and were always trying to lighten the tense mood with a joke, witty remark, or sarcasm. This time, Arthur was not in the mood for either. Though his words did seem to sound a bit more serious when he heard him express his approval of what Arthur had done. He knew he didn't need it. There were very few people that Arthur sought approval of. That he wanted their advice for. That he wished for their council. Guinevère, was the first on that list. Would everything constantly remind him of her? He knew that today would be difficult to get through. That in a bed where he was meant to lie with her in at night, he would be alone. He would not be able to hold her or kiss her or be with her. The thought caused a shooting pain to move through his heart, though remained composed in the presence of Kolby.

"I appreciate your support," he said in a strong tone, rather than personalizing it. That much was true. While Arthur felt he had made the right decision, it was always reassuring to hear a man that he had grown to respect and love as a brother, express his support to him. He also knew he was trying to lighten the mood, but this time, Arthur could not find the solace in it. The one person who gave him peace and solace, was the one who had now broken his heart. "I don't need to beat anything," he told him. Knowing that Kolby was joking and his response made it sound more literal. He looked at him for a moment, knowing that he had to appear as if he was fine, when in the inside, he had felt as if he had died. Not to be over dramatic. He looked at him with a gaze that lacked emotion, and one that showed more formality than it should have. "I did not know you were capable of being serious," he said, having attempted to offer a jest, but once again, it came out far more serious than it should have.