A Restless Night (Elyan)

[Caitrin de Archer]

Caitrin laughed to herself and ran a hand through her hair. It felt silly in a way that she was already thinking about her child being courted, and they hadn’t even been born yet. “Concerned because I know what I got up to at court my Lord.” She said mischievously with a glint in her eyes. She wouldn’t like to think her children were getting up to such things, but she didn’t want them to be led by the experience of others. She would strive to raise her children to be strong of course. “If I do my job they won’t need a push.” She winked at Elyan, but she was glad her children would have others watching out for them at court as well as her and her husband. That was important of course especially as they were growing up. They would know that there was always someone there to look out for them and guide them.

The night air was still quite warm, despite sundown being quite some time ago. As she sat down, the full weight of her belly became apparent to her, she was ready to burst yet the baby still hadn’t shown itself. Caitrin shifted herself so that she could sit comfortably, but nothing seemed to work. She wouldn’t be comfortable until this baby was in her arms. She really was too big, and it felt good to take the weight of the child off her feet for a few moments. Caitrin smiled at Elyan as he spoke, “Then what would you suggest my Lord, to make it completely perfect?” She asked, grinning softly because it was something to be thought on. She couldn’t imagine anything that could make the gardens any more beautiful than they already were.

The sudden flash of light in the night sky caught Caitrin’s attentions straight away. Her eyes darted up as the light ran across the starry sky. It was a beautiful, and almost magical sight to behold. She nodded at Elyan, “I saw it my Lord.” It was truly breathtaking, she wanted to say it was magical but she stopped herself just in time, and substituted it for, “What do you think it means?” She asked him, rather taken aback by what the heavens had given them on this evening. Perhaps it was a sign of good things to come, perhaps it was the spirits showing her that she was going to be fine, and so would her child.

[cherryblossom131]

Elyan laughed at her words about what she must have been like in her days at court. He decided there was no need to pry any longer because he had a pretty good idea about what she meant. "If I ever have children," he mused. "I would most definitely not want them to take after my amazing ability to attract trouble," he chuckled. He only escaped most of the impossible situations he had constantly landed himself into, by pure and utter luck. Either that or his sister Gwen would help him out. Maybe that was reason enough that Elyan should steer clear of having his own children. “If I do my job they won’t need a push.” He chuckled. "I'm sure you'll be an excellent mother, you'll do your job amazingly" he said sincerely. He didn't doubt his words at all. "And if you and your husband ever need help, don't hesitate to ask." He meant that genuinely.

He was staring at a couple of forget me not's. They were one of Gwen's favourite flowers if he remembered correctly. He'd have to ask her about that in the morning, or the next time he saw her. “Then what would you suggest my Lord, to make it completely perfect?” He smiled at her words and had to think for a moment. "Nothing in this world is truly perfect," he began. "But I think that is the beauty of it." Nothing is perfect because nothing should be perfect. Elyan believed it was better that way. The garden was not perfect which just resulted in making it more spectacular. It gave it a more rural and natural feeling. "If it was perfect," he began. "Then I don't think it would be quite as beautiful," he sighed. "What do you think?"

The light in the sky was unlike anything he had ever seen before. Another may call it magic, but Elyan did not think sorcery was part of it. He had heard of something like it described to him before. A shooting star, they called it, to be seen at least once in one's lifetime. But hearing about it and seeing it were two very different things indeed. He grinned at Caitrin when she said she saw it too. So, it was not just some trick of the eyes. He was relieved that it was in fact real and not just proof that he should sleep. “What do you think it means?” He paused for a moment in thought. The smile on his face after seeing such a thing had not yet subsided. "I think it may be a sign from the spirits." What a pleasant thought that was. "Even those beyond the stars themselves believe in Camelot and its prosperity," he chuckled incredulously. "And the stars must think that your baby will be strong and healthy," he smiled warmly at her. "A story you can tell the little one when they're older."

[Caitrin de Archer]

Caitrin found herself laughing along with Elyan’s words. She did wonder what sort of trouble Elyan did get himself into. He was a knight after all, so she was sure he had his fair share of trouble. Caitrin wondered what knights did get up to when they weren’t fighting wars, obviously Elyan just, in his words, attracted trouble. Caitrin nudged Elyan slightly with her elbow and smirked at him, “Well, it’s not the first time I’ve been called trouble.” Caitrin laughed at her own words, showing she was only jesting with him. She knew he hadn’t been calling her trouble directly, but they had quite randomly run into each other tonight, but she wasn’t complaining because she was enjoying his company immensely. His next words touched Caitrin quite a lot, because she knew she would always have friends in Camelot, and that meant a lot to her. She wanted her children to grow up in a loving environment, and if her children were well received in Camelot then that was all she could ask for, “Well I hope you still feel the same when you meet the little one.” She gave a gentle smile, but she was still jesting with Elyan somewhat. “But thank you.”

She could see where Elyan was coming from really. If something was truly perfect then it’s beauty was ruined somewhat, because everyone saw it in the same way. If it was only nearly perfect then it could be made beautiful however someone wanted, and it was free to interpretation. Caitrin nodded at Elyan, “No, I agree, nearly perfect is quite perfect enough.” No one could say anything was perfect really, well, if they were they were lying. She knew her children would be perfect in her eyes, but that didn’t make them so by default. She knew that already, but a mother was supposed to unconditionally love her children, and think that everything they did (within reason) was perfect.

Caitrin still wanted to hold onto the belief that there was sorcery at work. Maybe it was even a message from her people, or a sign that her child would be healthy. Perhaps they would even have her gift. Gosh, she was running away with herself, but in Mercia such things were always a sign of good things to come, things could not be that different in Camelot. “I hope so.” Caitrin breathed out, running her hands over her belly. She so wanted this to go right, she wanted to have a swift birth, and have a strong, healthy babe at the end of this long struggle. Jesu, it meant the world to her, “Perhaps the spirits tell of good things to come for you as well my Lord?” Caitrin suggested with a grin.

[cherryblossom131]

“Well, it’s not the first time I’ve been called trouble.” He chuckled at that. "I'm almost certain it won't be the last," he smirked at her playfully. Looking at the heavily pregnant women before him he could hardly imagine her as a troublesome young lady, except for that playful glint in her eye. He'd recognise that anywhere. He chuckled at her next words. “But thank you.” He smiled warmly at her. "You're very welcome, and I'm sure your child will be great." He had genuinely meant what he said. If they needed him he'd help, even if her children did happen to be little hell raisers. He'd rather they weren't of course, but he was rarely lucky like that. "Of course if they are wild hellish children, I'll be running for the hills," he said in mock seriousness, before laughing.

Perfection could only really be interpreted. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, as they say. Perfection is something one can only strive for, but never attain. It was better that way. He smiled at her when she spoke. "Well good, because I'm sure if I told the gardener that I didn't think the gardens were perfect, let’s just say I really don't like the look of that pointy rake." He laughed. The gardeners worked hard to keep the gardens up to a royal standard, so he imagined they wouldn't be particularly happy if Elyan ever criticised their hard work. They'd run after him with all sorts of weapons which had happened to Elyan once before after a complete misunderstanding. It wasn't fun.

He had every belief that both Caitrin and her child would be completely healthy after birth. But he would still keep them in his prayers if sheer hope and confidence was not enough. Plus she had a shooting star in her favour, so what could go wrong? He froze for a split second but not long enough for Caitrin to notice. Whenever he said or even thought that, something always went wrong. Then again things usually went wrong for Elyan, so he was probably just being overly paranoid. “Perhaps the spirits tell of good things to come for you as well my Lord?” He smiled at her suggestion. "Oh I don't know about that," he chuckled. "Anyway I'm pretty sure the light was looking at you," he said teasingly. He liked to believe in things like miricles and 'shooting stars' it made the world mysterious and spectacular, like there is always more to it than any one person can know. "Do you believe in this kind of stuff?" He waved his arm toward the sky where the shooting star had been.

[Caitrin de Archer]

Caitrin could never imagine a time where she wasn’t considered trouble to someone in her life. Her husband was always saying that she was trouble because she was a Mercian. Somehow he always got that in there, that she must be trouble because she was a Mercian. “So am I.” She sad a little mischievously, after all, it would be boring if she was well behaved all of the time. Her husband certainly wouldn’t appreciate it. Caitrin found herself laughing at Elyan’s later words. She was sure that her children wouldn’t be little hell raisers, but you never knew really did you? She hadn’t met them yet, so she had no idea what they would be like. “I’m sure they won’t give you cause to run away, I hope not anyway.” She brushed her lips into a smile and just looked back at Elyan, “Though I wouldn’t want them to be perfect either.” She couldn’t stand the idea of her children being perfect, in any sense, she wanted them to have their own little personalities, and to grow and develop in their own way. They didn’t have to be perfect for her.

Yes, it was probably better if the gardener didn’t hear of their opinion that his garden wasn’t perfect. Pregnant or not, she probably wouldn’t escape the rake. Caitrin giggled at Elyan and shook her head, “We’ll just tell him that it is perfect.” She was sure he would like that anyway. No one really got on the wrong side of the gardeners, they did an absolutely fantastic job anyway, and Caitrin had no interested in upsetting someone who had a pointy rake.

Caitrin knew she was strong, and healthy, so she didn’t have anything to worry about. As long as the baby helped her along with her labour then both mother and child would be fine after the birth. The baby was strong enough, she knew that from the amount she had been beaten black and blue from the inside. Some told her that that meant that she was going to have a boy, because of how feisty the child was. However, then some told her that it meant she was having a girl because girls were more active in the womb. In truth she had no idea what to believe anymore. She just wanted to think she was having a healthy child, and that was it. She just ran a hand over her belly and prayed for a few moments, prayed that everything would be fine.

Elyan’s words dragged her out of her thoughts but she quickly nodded at him. “I do.” She confirmed rather passionately. In Mercia they had been taught to pray to the spirits and to respect those who had passed. It was thought they would look over them, and guide them during their lives. Occasionally they were meant to send signs, but this had been the first time that Caitrin had been sent anything of the sort. “In Mercia we believe that spirits send us signs, maybe this is one such sign.” She smiled at Elyan, “Why, do you not believe in such things?”

[cherryblossom131]

He was enjoying joking with Caitrin, as a smile stretched across his face. He had no doubt her child would be a wonderful, little miracle. Although, judging by what Caitrin was saying about being a bit of a trouble maker in her youth, he didn't doubt that her child would most probably inherit that trait. “Though I wouldn’t want them to be perfect either.” He completely agreed. There was no such thing as a perfect child, that would be horrible. Children, and people in general just weren't meant to be perfect. They should have their own personalities and make their own mistakes, otherwise how would they become stronger as people. Children were still perfect in their parents eyes though...at least for the first day or two after being born, he thought with a smile.

“We’ll just tell him that it is perfect.” He chuckled. "Smart idea," he grinned at her. He doubted the gardener would quite have the same views that he and Caitrin shared about what perfection really was. Everyone was still entitled to their own opinions though right? So he would respect that, like the gentleman he was. It had absolutely nothing to do with the extremely threatening rakes that the gardeners seemed to have with them all the time. "I'm not really one for gardening though," he smiled. "That was always Gwen's speciality." He hardly knew the names of most of the flowers here. Gwen probably would, he thought with a smile. She got that from their mother.

He quite liked the idea of being sent a sign from the beyond. He sighed thinking of his parents; it was probably naive of him to think that the impossible light was from them. But it was almost like a reassurance that there is something on the other side. That after death there isn't just nothingness, there is something more, something that will forever remain a mystery to the living at least. “Why, do you not believe in such things?” He looked over to her and gave her a small smile. "I'd like to," he began. He was afraid to hope for such a thing, as a sign from the long since passed. "But sometimes I fear it may be a little too close to magic," he confessed. He rarely talked about sorcery, but then again no one spoke about it.

[Caitrin de Archer]

This was another thing that she and Elyan had in common. Caitrin had never had the patience for gardening, and she didn’t really enjoy it. She was a much too active person to find pleasure in planting and tending to a garden. She scrunched up her face slightly, “I’ve never cared much for gardening. I enjoy the beauty of a garden, but not gardening itself.” She chuckled slightly, “I’m not patient enough for the hobby.” The mention of Gwen felt a little odd, she still didn’t know the new Queen very well at all, but who better than to learn from than her brother? “I suppose she’ll have servants to tend the gardens now for her?” Caitrin knew that Gwen had been a servant once, but perhaps she would enjoy the luxury of having others do the tasks for her. Again she had no idea, she could only guess.

Caitrin would have loved to be completely sure that the star had been a sign from her Mercian ancestors that everything would run swiftly with her labour. Perhaps it was from her old tutor, Helgund. The woman, after all, had been like a mother to Caitrin, more so than her actual mother after all. Caitrin would have loved for Helgund to be able to see her children, she knew that the woman loved children, especially babies, and it would have been a proud moment for Caitrin as well. She had no one to show the child off to, family wise, apart from her Uncle. She knew that he was proud of her, but he was also annoyed in a sense. He was an old man, and the last thing he wanted was to live under the same roof as a crying baby. Perhaps her husbands family would be more willing to see the child when he or she was finally born.

The mention of sorcery made Caitrin just pause for a few moments, not really showing a reaction at all; she was too afraid to. Elyan might be a knight, and she might regard him as a friend, but it changed nothing in regards to her sorcery. No one could ever know, her husband knew, and that was it within Camelot anyway. “I’m sorry if I offended you sir.” She quickly said “I did not mean to dabble so close to sorcery, I was just stating the way I have been brought up.” Her tone wasn’t defensive, or particularly friendly, but she just needed to get this across and quickly. Perhaps talk of spirits was too close to sorcery, she’d never really thought about it before now. Jesu, she began to panic, and the pains in her belly were starting again. She groaned slightly and stretched her legs outwards, trying to get comfortable. The little one wasn’t going to settle tonight, she could already feel it. Then again, she was panicked enough, but she knew she had to calm herself down, she couldn’t get like this whenever magic was just mentioned, “I don’t think anything will settle this one tonight.” She said with a warm smile back to Elyan as she ran her hands over her belly. The child was starting to kick again, perhaps hinting that an arrival would soon be in order.

[cherryblossom131]

He smiled at Caitrin when she mentioned that she didn't much like gardening either. That was something they had in common. He probably didn't like it because he just didn't have the patience for it. He wouldn't be able to care for one flower until it bloomed let alone a whole garden. Gwen was so much more patient than him. “I suppose she’ll have servants to tend the gardens now for her?” He chuckled at that. "I don't think so, she'd let them help maybe but she wouldn't let them do it for her." Gwen loved flowers, so she would want to tend to them herself. "She likes to do most things herself, so I doubt she'll be using many servants at all." Gwen was a very independent person, she'd always been the one that cooked and cleaned at home for him and his father. He doubted she'd be that different just because she was now queen.

When he watched her reaction he instantly regretted his words. Magic was a very unspoken subject; practically forbiddon. He had been foolish to speak of it to her. “I’m sorry if I offended you sir.” He shook his head, hating the formality now in her tone. "No, no of course not." As she continued he realised he must have offended her, and also the way she was brought up. He kicked himself inwardly and silently sighed. He was such an idiot. "That's...that's not what I meant," he sighed. He'd just said the first thing that had popped into his head and didn't think. "I'm sorry if I offended you for speaking about such a thing." He saw her getting increasingly uncomfortable and felt even worse and guiltier for not shutting his mouth when he should have. She was a noble for goodness sake; she probably despised magic like most of the nobles in court usually did. That was no doubt the reason to way she was getting so uncomfortable, it was his fault. “I don’t think anything will settle this one tonight.” He sighed and half smiled at her, just stopping himself from saying 'I'm sorry it's probably my fault for not keeping my stupid mouth shut.' He was afraid that she might in pain and yet there was nothing he could do about it. "Would you like some water?" He had no idea if it would help. "I could quickly run down to the well and get some," he offered.

[Caitrin de Archer]

Caitrin wasn’t sure whether she should be surprised or not at the fact Elyan told her that Gwen wouldn’t be using that many servants. She supposed it made sense because Gwen herself had been a servant once. Caitrin had been lucky enough to always be a Lady of noble birth, and she had always used servants as an extension of herself. Though she had never used them unnecessarily. They had servants around the de Archer estate, but she didn’t have her own maid, or dresser or anything like that. She couldn’t afford it, and neither would she want one. She was independent enough to make and keep her own dresses and rooms for goodness sake. “I think it’s quite, unusual if you don’t mind me saying so, for a Queen to not have many servants.” She didn’t mean to offend of course, she was just pointing it out, “But perhaps it is a good change, after all, I’ve always thought that Ladies keep too many servants anyway.” She smiled, to show she was not disapproving of Gwen or her plans at all. She didn’t want to appear rude in front of the ladies brother after all. Gwen would possibly bring a breath of fresh air to the court, which was well needed in a way.

She shifted uncomfortably, feeling that she had misinterpreted Elyan’s words somewhat. She needed to learn to not be so defensive about sorcery. After all, nothing was going to change the laws in Camelot to accommodate her kind, and as she had grown older she had accepted that. She knew there had been an agreement with the druids, but that was a small deal, one which could be easily pushed aside in the future, anyone knew that. She would never tell anyone she was a sorceress, excepting her husband of course, until she was completely sure she would be safe. She had a family to worry about as well, how would they fend if she was sent to the pyre? The mere thought made Caitrin want to retch, so she closed her eyes and breathed out slowly, her hands settling on her belly. She just wanted to get back those feelings of euphoria, she was going to be a mother, and nothing else mattered, “No it’s fine, honestly,” She felt rather flustered in a way, “Mercia does not have the same sanctions against sorcery as Camelot does, so I worried I had overstepped the mark somewhat.” She wasn’t sure how, but she was covering her tracks. True, Caitrin had spent a large portion of her life here in Camelot, but that meant nothing in the grand scheme of things. She was still a Mercian at heart.

Caitrin nodded softly at Elyans suggestion of getting her some water. It would probably help after all. She sat up straight, still trying to get comfortable. She had a feeling she would never get to sleep tonight, “Only if it is not too much trouble?” She asked with a smile at her lips, hoping it would calm the child down. She was sure as soon as she got her nerves in order then the child too would calm.

[cherryblossom131]

Elyan didn't think Gwen really liked the idea of servants waiting on her hand and foot. She had of course been in that position once, which he knew she was most definitely not ashamed about. It just gave her perspective that none of the others nobles had, not even Arthur. She had been born and raised on the other side so she understood them like no other. It's what made her such a great queen and why Elyan was so proud of her. He chuckled at her words of how it was odd for Gwen as queen to not have many servants. "Well the fact that she is queen is quite unusual and remarkable in itself," he smiled at her. He chuckled at her next words. "Can't say I don't agree," he teased. Some ladies needed maids to do even menial tasks for them, simply because they couldn't do it themselves. He doubted the Lady Caitrin was like that, she seemed like a pretty strong women even in her current state.

Elyan still felt bad for making her feel so uncomfortable. Judging by the way she was breathing she almost looked ill. He did not think the thought of magic could make someone so...well flustered for fail of a better word. As she spoke on about Mercia's stance on magic he closed his eyes for a moment in realisation. Ah, so it was not that she despised magic. "Oh right, no it was I who brought up the subject anyway, and you needn't worry about what you say here," he smiled weakly at her, he wasn't going to throw her in the dungeons just for speaking about sorcery. "I mean it's not like you actually have magic," he chuckled disbelievingly. He knew Camelot was not a particularly good place to even speak of such a thing and to be honest Elyan wasn't quite sure of what he thought of magic, since it had been a big part of the reason his father died. But after the recent somewhat agreement with the druids, which he had sort of been a part of and would not be forgetting any time soon, maybe Camelot's views on magic were relaxing under Arthur's rule.

“Only if it is not too much trouble?” He smiled and shook his head at her inquiry. "No, not at all. I'll only be a moment." He got up from the bench and began walking towards the well. It wasn't a long walk but he still hastened his pace to get there, Caitrin did look rather ill. Once he finally got there he found a pitcher by the well and poured some water until it was full. The water was rather cold since it was night but he hoped she wouldn't mind. He made his way back to the gardens again and all but jogged toward her with the pitcher in hand. "Here." he handed the water to her for her to take. "It's a bit cold though," he said apologetically, maybe pregnant women were only meant to have warm water; he really had no idea about this kind of stuff. "If you want it warmed I can heat it down in the kitchen for you, it's really no trouble."

[Caitrin de Archer]

It was of course true that the fact that Gwen was Queen was a miracle in itself. After all, she wasn’t supposed to have been anything other than a servant. A few years ago, if you had suggested that a servant would one day be the Queen of Camelot, and bear future heirs, they would have locked you up for fears of madness. Caitrin nodded, she wasn’t quite sure what she thought of Gwen becoming Queen yet, she wasn’t going to say anything to Elyan obviously. But everything in her upbringing told her that she shouldn’t be being ruled by a servant. It was the way she had been brought up, that Royal blood was kept pure or so to speak. However, she did like Gwen from what little she had seen of her, and she was sure she would make a great Queen. Arthur respected and loved her, so Caitrin supposed she did by default; Arthur had always been an excellent judge of character after all. “I am sure she will make an excellent Queen.” Caitrin finally voiced with a warm smile, “Though I have to admit I do not know her as well as I perhaps should.” With one thing and another Caitrin hadn’t been at court a lot in the past months, so she had not kept up with the latest social circles.

There was an odd jolt of panic as Elyan spoke. Well, at least she had convinced him that she didn’t have sorcery; that was one thing. But his words made her a little sad as she knew she could never reveal her true self, and that her magic would always be suppressed and just forgotten about. Her own child would probably never know the truth about their own mother. Still, she was worried in case her child showed signs of sorcery. “True.” She finally said, brushing some hair behind her ears, “I doubt there is anyone left in Camelot with sorcery.” She volunteered bravely, but you would have to be insane to stay here if you were a powerful sorcerer. Caitrin’s magic was only weak, so she could get by without, even if it did annoy her.

Caitrin took the pitcher from Elyan gratefully, as she was still trying to calm herself down. It really wasn’t working; her breathing was as bad as ever and her belly was swelling in pain every now and again. She wasn’t sure why her child was suddenly so active, maybe it sensed that its mother was stressed. “It’s fine, I think I need something cool.” She pointed out and just began to sip from the water. It did make her feel better, though she wasn’t sure whether it was just a placebo effect or not. Neither did she really care either. “Thank you, I think it’s just what I needed.” She was half glugging the water, and perhaps she hadn’t realised how thirsty she was. “I should probably return to my chambers soon.” She said a little sadly as she didn’t really want to leave Elyan, “Perhaps a lie down will help me to calm down.”

[cherryblossom131]

Elyan did not even begin to suspect that Caitrin had any magic in her. Otherwise she would not have come to Camelot where people who even assisted sorcerers were punished. Of course it was not quite the same as Uther's rule where anyone who was suspected of sorcery or assisting sorcerer's were killed without a second thought no matter if they were innocent or not. Like his sister almost had been and like his father was. He felt the embers of anger in the core of his stomach. It did not burn like it had when he'd learned the exact circumstances of his father's death. He wasn't even sure what he'd been more angry at; Uther for executing an innocent man, the sorcerer who'd gotten his father into the mess in the first place, or himself who could have prevented it from ever happening if he hadn't been so selfish and left his family to fend for themselves. He sighed, there was no point dwelling on the guilt that would probably never quite leave him again. “I doubt there is anyone left in Camelot with sorcery.” He raised an eyebrow in thought. "I'm not quite so sure about that," he contemplated. "For a kingdom that has banned magic on pain of death, there are a surprisingly substantial amount of sorcerers that either attack or are still lingering." He didn't think it was very smart idea for a powerful sorcerer to stay in a kingdom that would have them killed.

After she drank the water she did look a little better, but not by much. She looked in pain and Elyan was almost worried that she might even be in labour; after all she did look large enough. But he wasn't at all experienced in that sort of thing. What if there was something wrong? Elyan began panicking. “Thank you, I think it’s just what I needed.” He was slightly relieved to hear that and raised his eyebrows when she downed most of the pitcher. Wow, she must have been very thirsty. He was still concerned for her though. He felt a little sad that she might be leaving him soon but maybe she was right. Maybe a lie down would be exactly what she needed...maybe. But what if there really was something wrong with her, or god forbid the baby. He couldn't just let her go like this, could he? "Of course, but I really think it would be a good idea to go and see Gaius, just in case there's anything wrong." She had looked like she was in pain. "I mean...you're not in labour are you?" No, that was something they'd definitely have to go to Gaius for.

[Caitrin de Archer]

The fact that she was a sorceress shouldn’t have still left Caitrin feeling so nervous and worked up. She knew that. She’d been living this lie for years, the only person in Camelot who knew she was a sorceress was her husband, and that was because she had saved both their lives through her sorcery. He’d still accepted her for who she was, but he wasn’t from Camelot, so she couldn’t expect the same reception everywhere and she knew that. She managed a small smile at Elyan and tucked some hair behind her ear. If he noticed how worked up she was then she would probably have to make up something, no one could ever know the truth, not unless by some miracle magic was one day returned to the kingdom. She remembered Nimueh had once told her that sorcery would one day return to Camelot, she hadn’t believed her, and she was gone now anyway. She was sure it would never happen anyway, and her children would be raised in a kingdom where magic was seen as evil. That thought alone near killed her inside. Elyan’s words were true, and Caitrin shrugged slightly, “I wouldn’t blame those with sorcery for wanting to hide, or leave the kingdom.” She couldn’t say that they should leave the kingdom because that would make her a hypocrite, but her words were true. She would hope that her kind would try and preserve themselves, she knew they were still around her, though she didn’t know exactly who they were.

The water had helped somewhat but her belly was still pulsing in pain, her child was beating her black and blue from the inside and she groaned out. The child had never been this active, but their mother had never been so panicked so quickly. Caitrin ran her hands over her belly and closed her eyes, willing the child to settle. It was almost working until Elyan mentioned going seeing Gaius. Her eyes sharply found his again, and her heart thudded in her ears, “Why, is something wrong?” She was half panicked, but she had no experience of this. She’d never even seen a pregnant woman go into labour before, she didn’t know what to expect. Elyan’s words really weren’t helping. She wasn’t in labour was she? Breathing out slowly she tried to calm herself again, but it really wasn’t working, “I-I don’t think I’m in labour, it doesn’t feel like I am.” There was a dull uncomfortable pain there, but she just assumed it was her child shifting round in the womb, it was nothing she hadn’t had before. Her waters hadn’t broken anyway so she was sure she was fine. “Should we really go to see Gaius?” She was still incredibly nervous, what if she was in labour, gosh, this was all new and exciting and most of all it was completely terrifying.

[cherryblossom131]

It would be a lie to say Elyan's views on sorcerers hadn't changed the day he learnt of his father's death. He hadn't really given magic a second's thought before then though. It's not to say that he supported sorcerer's, no that would have gotten him killed, but he hadn't hated them. After his father's death however it painted them in a different light in Elyan's eyes. “I wouldn’t blame those with sorcery for wanting to hide, or leave the kingdom.” They would be executed otherwise. "No, nor do I but they probably shouldn't be here in the first place." He still wasn't quite sure if he hated sorcerer's because despite everything it was hard to believe an entire race of people to be evil. Elyan just wasn't sure if he could judge people like that. "Although who knows, especially after the deal with the druids, maybe magic will be allowed back in Camelot." With Uther's rule that suggestion would have been a definite impossibility but Arthur did not rule with an iron fist like his father had. Nor did he rule with a stone cold heart like his father also had.

He hadn't really meant to panic, but she just looked like she was in pain. He was the last person on Earth to know whether the pain she was in was normal or not. He realised he was causing her to panic and he wasn't stupid enough to know that it wasn't a very good thing to do. "No no I'm sure there's nothing wrong." He realised how horrible his attempt to stop her panicking was as soon as he'd said it. “I-I don’t think I’m in labour, it doesn’t feel like I am.” He couldn't help but feel slightly relieved about that but her uncertainty was still a little unnerving. "Well...well that's a good thing then." He gave her an uncertain smile. "We're probably just making a big deal out of nothing." He chuckled uncertainly realising he really wasn't helping. He had no idea what to do and he actually felt a little terrified although he probably shouldn't disclose that piece of information. He could hardly imagine what she must be feeling then since she was the one that was actually pregnant. “Should we really go to see Gaius?” Gaius was probably asleep by now, but he'd know more about this than Elyan. "Maybe, I mean have you ever been in pain like this before?" If she had, and everything had been fine, then maybe there was no need to go to Gaius.

[Caitrin de Archer]

Sometimes Caitrin did wonder if she was stupid for remaining in Camelot, but she had nowhere left to go anymore. She wasn’t welcome back in Mercia, and they couldn’t go to Griff’s home, mainly because his family didn’t really like her, but because they weren’t in line to inherit the estate; Lucan was, and he wouldn’t want them there all the time would he? He had his own family now after all, and she knew that your own family always came first. She couldn’t be annoyed at that. Her family had all but thrown her out of Mercia, at any rate she couldn’t ever go home, not if she wanted to keep her children safe. She didn’t even have Oliver there anymore to guarantee her safety. “Perhaps not.” She managed softly and just ran a hand over her belly. Oh, she had forgotten about the fact the Druid’s were now free to live and practise their magic. Caitrin wasn’t a druid though so that kindness didn’t extend to her. She was a sorceress in her own right, she had power over fire, and she would never know the full extent to those powers. “Who knows what the King will introduce.” Arthur was always merciful, she knew that, but she had no idea how he would react with actual sorcerers. Would they too be treated the same as the druid’s eventually?

She was still panicking, it didn’t matter to her that Elyan probably had no experience with pregnant women, when he had raised a concern she had still panicked. Breathing in and out slowly wasn’t working anymore and she bit her lip, trying to calm herself down that way. How would she know if she was in labour or just in pain? She’d never been pregnant before so she had no idea. She just tried to nod at him as he suggested they were making a big thing out of nothing, but that was before her belly started hurting again, and she breathed through her teeth slowly. Jesu, what was going on? She wanted her bed, and her husband, and for someone to tell her she was going to be alright. She had been told that you were in labour once your waters broke, and that hadn’t happened yet, so she wasn’t sure if this was a pre-labour pain or whether the little one was just distressed. She wasn’t helping either way. “Everything will be fine.” She finally said, both hands on her belly. Biting her lip she shook her head, she’d never felt anything like this before. It was like her whole body was going into a series of spasms, “No, I haven’t.” Was this why she couldn’t sleep? Because her little one was trying to make their entry into the world? Jesu, this was all going too quickly for Caitrin and she just breathed out, “I’m not in that much pain though, it just feels different.” She put one hand on her forehead, “I’m not helping am I?”

[cherryblossom131]

He wasn’t totally sure how he was supposed to react but he knew panicking was definitely not a good place to start. How to stop panicking however, he did not know. She might be in labour for goodness sake, and he had no idea what to do. First things first though. "Look at me." He had to get her to calm down, and then maybe her baby will calm down with her. That might be the only thing causing this after all. Her baby might just be distressed. "Everything is going to be alright." Whether she was in labour or not, he would help her anyway. There really wasn't anything to be overly worried about anyway, she was only going to give birth. No, calm is what he was trying to strive for, and he wasn't even feeling it.

He was far from relieved when she said she'd hadn't felt this kind of pain before. That was just further clarification that she could be in labour. At her next words, he wasn't sure if she meant them or if she was just trying to make him feel better, either way she was still in pain. “I’m not helping am I?” He gave a soft chuckle. "Seeing as you're the pregnant one, you don't need to have that at the forefront of your mind." He was supposed to be helping her. "Look, just....just breathe, slowly." He looked right at her so she wouldn't get distracted by anything around them or the pain inside her and so she would only concentrate on breathing. "Slowly, just breathe in," he inhaled with her, "and out," he exhaled with her and continued to do that. He'd seen pregnant women breathing slowly to help with any sort of pain, he hoped it would work. After a few silent breaths he stopped, leaving her to do it on her own. "Are you feeling any better?"

[Caitrin de Archer]

Panicking was probably the least helpful thing here, but still, Caitrin was panicking nonetheless. She couldn’t help herself. She should probably have not left the room in retrospect, because if anything did happen then she was here, and not with her husband which was where she knew she should be. Right, everything was going to be fine wasn’t it? If worst came to worst she was sure Elyan could carry her, or go and get help, or something. At least she wasn’t here, suffering whatever this was, alone. It was probably nothing more than a panic attack, or something like that. She’d never had one before and now seemed like a strange time to start but it was happening nonetheless. When Elyan spoke she complied with him without a second thought, right, he was telling her everything was going to be fine, so she had to believe him. “Okay.” Was all she could think to say, both hands were over her belly, which was still hurting, but the pain was lessening slightly, or perhaps that was just because she was calming down.

Caitrin smiled at Elyan, at least he was trying to help, he might have been panicking as well, but he certainly wasn’t showing it. She did as he said, and tried to breathe in and out slowly while keeping looking at him. It helped to just concentrate and breathe. The pain was starting to lessen, and she let out a small smile of relief. “It feels a bit better.” She admitted gratefully and then looked away from Elyan towards the castle, her room seemed like an incredibly long way away now she actually thought about it. “I want to go back to my husband.” She found herself saying. Even though the pain was getting a little better, if she was on the verge of going into labour, or if she was already in labour, she really needed to be with her husband. He probably wouldn’t do as good a job as Elyan had with keeping her calm, but she felt like she just needed him. He always made her feel calmer in his odd, quirky little way. It wasn’t her having a go at how Elyan was treating her in the slightest, but she just needed a little comfort from her husband right now, “Will you, will you walk me back to my room please?” She didn’t want to go on her own in case something did happen, after all, that would be the worst case scenario wouldn’t it?

[cherryblossom131]

Elyan breathed out a sigh of relief when she said she was feeling a bit better. Thank goodness for that because he really had no idea if the whole breathing technique would work. He certainly wasn't going to tell Caitrin that since he'd only just helped her calm down. "Well I'm glad I've done something right." He smiled warmly at her although he really did mean it. Of all the things he'd done in his life he'd never caused a pregnant woman to have a panic attack or go into labour. He should probably tick that off the metaphorical list of dumb things to do in life, he thought sarcastically. He shouldn't be so cynical, at least he'd somewhat helped to feel if only slightly better.

After she voiced her want to go back to her husband, he sighed inwardly. He was such an idiot just standing there, of course she'd want to go back to her husband if she was indeed in labour. He'd probably put down his lapse in common sense to his state of sleep deprivation. "Of, of course you do." He hit his head with the palm of his hand. "I'm so sorry; I probably should have taken you to him earlier." He'd been so caught in the possibility that Caitrin was about to have a baby that he hadn't even thought about the father. “Will you, will you walk me back to my room please?” He looked back at where they'd come from then back at Caitrin. "Yes, of course I will," he smiled then looked up at the castle again. They had walked quite a distance to get to the royal gardens and despite feeling a bit better Caitrin was surely still in some pain. He couldn't just make her walk. "Ah...I don't think you should be walking, especially not such a great distance." It would be too tiresome. "I really hope you don't mind but I think it would be better if I were to carry you." He looked at her apologetically.

[Caitrin de Archer]

Caitrin felt like she was putting too much effort into her breathing, but it was completely needed. She just felt strange, and her belly was still throbbing in occasional pain. Was she in labour? She had no idea, her waters hadn’t broken yet, so for all she knew this could be completely normal, and she might not be in labour at all. In truth she had no idea and all she could do was try to keep calm and just keep breathing in and out as best she could in an attempt to stop herself from becoming too panicked again. No matter what was happening, becoming panicked wouldn’t help anything. “Well I do feel a bit better.” It was only half a lie, and hopefully Elyan would believe her. She didn’t want him to feel bad, she didn’t even know she was in labour, and if she was it could have happened with or without him panicking her. She couldn’t really say.

At the moment, more than anything, she just wanted to get back to her husband. Not that Griff would be much help in this situation, but she would feel a lot calmer just in his company. She just wanted to get back to him now, and for him to tell her that she was going to be fine, and that their little family would soon be complete. Everything was going to be just fine. “It’s ok, we’ve been a little preoccupied.” She tried to jest, but she moaned out in pain as her lower abdomen just burst out in pain again. It just felt incredibly uncomfortable and she really just needed to lie down. She was a little shocked when Elyan offered to carry her up to her room. After all, it wasn’t as if she was the slender woman she had been a few months ago, “Are-Are you sure?” She asked in-between gasps, “I am quite heavy.” She stood up, because either way she was going to have to stand to move whether Elyan was going to carry her or whether she was going to just walk herself.

[cherryblossom131]

Elyan hoped beyond hope that the breathing technique would work. It was all he could think of in his panicked state of mind even though he tried his best not to show it. “Well I do feel a bit better.” He looked back at her and smiled weakly. He knew she'd say that anyway even if she didn't feel better at all, just to make him feel a little better. It wasn't really working but he kept the smile on his face nonetheless even if it didn't quite reach his eyes. "Good, that's definitely a good thing." If she did indeed feel better then she probably wasn't in labour. Despite being a man Elyan was aware of how painful the whole process of childbirth could be. He let out a breath. Now what? He didn't have any other tricks up his sleeve to help relieve her pain anymore. Not that he'd been much help in the first place anyway.

Her husband of course should be with his very pregnant wife. Elyan already began to feel guilty for keeping her out for so long. Maybe her husband was already awake and searching for her with no clue as to where she was. He'd probably already be extremely worried. He assesed the situation. He was quite certain that the fastest way to get her to her room with the most convenience was to carry Caitrin. But she was a very pregnant woman so he'd have to be careful. "Yes I'm quite sure, I don't think it would be good to walk." Especially if she was in pain. What kind of man would he be if he just let that happen. He walked towards her after she got up and gave her another apologetic look. "I'm sorry in advance," he said creasing his eyebrows before bending down slightly so that he could lift her up. She'd been right before, she was quite heavy he thought as he let out a quite sigh too low for her to hear. He'd never tell her of course, it certainly wouldn't help. He tried to shift her weght as carefully as he could in his arms so that it would be as comfortable as possible for both of them. He stayed like for a moment before he finally felt like he definitely had good balance and would surely never drop her. With a last sigh Elyan gave her a small smile despite himself. "Onwards?" He said with the smile still on his lips attempting to lighten up the potentially awkward situation.