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Although as a child Caitrin, in her ignorance, supposed Mercia to boast some spectacular scenery, it really did pale in comparison to the array of colours and forests which Camelot boasted. Mercia altogether was quite rocky and mountainous; it was in the north after all. Her father had told her that the mountains protected them from those who were further north than them raising armies against them. However, they always seemed to be under attack from someone so Caitrin supposed that the mountains really did serve no purpose other than to be quite scenic. “Mercia is quite mountainous, whereas Camelot is quite flat in comparison, but it is prettier than Mercia.” She agreed softly with Yassia’s words. “We have forests as well, but they are a lot darker than the ones here.” The forests in Mercia were overgrown with mighty oaks which blocked natural light from most of the forest routes and altogether made journeying through them quite a nerving experience.

Caitrin beamed as Yassia confirmed that she would think of her friend whilst on ride’s out with Terrell. She was already enjoying Yassia’s company more than she thought she ever would. Caitrin never usually found it so easy to converse with other members of the court, quite characteristically she preferred male company, as they were sometimes friendlier than the women courtiers. For example, Arthur was one of her closest friends, and she enjoyed having quite deep conversations with him at times. Caitrin proved, in a way, that you didn’t have to just speak to members of the same sex without it being inappropriate. “Hopefully you will have many happy memories to take back with you.” Caitrin smiled broadly back at Yassia, she was already hoping that their paths would cross again after tonight.

Caitrin now considered what Yassia would think of Griflet, he was quite unlike many of the traditional courtiers, then again neither of them were what you could call traditional. It had been a rather mixed up courting at best. He had been quite persistent in his advances and she had found herself falling for them slowly but surely. She laughed as Yassia called him a coward, oh if he could hear that he would probably make it his business to set her straight. In truth Caitrin did not know why he had not asked her yet, but it didn’t bother her too much. The topic of marriage always set heavy in Caitrin’s mind, and at present they just seemed to be enjoying each other’s company and seeing where it led them. “I think he is just waiting until we are both ready.” Caitrin pointed out but she kept a smile on her face nonetheless. As Yassia spoke of Caitrin falling in love with Griff Caitrin’s cheeks twinged a slight pink and she went to speak but didn’t. No one had ever really brought love into hers and Griff’s courtship before, they had just been seen to be some sort of fling that was spiralling into something more. “Well I am still falling in love, I have not fallen completely quite yet.” That was her stubbornness of course, the fact she did not want to admit she had fallen in love quite so quickly as she had often resounded to never fall for any man. She just couldn’t help herself with Griff though, it was the way he smiled at her, and the way he could always surprise her that just made her melt every time they were together.

As Yassia confirmed she did know of Camelot’s attitudes towards magic Caitrin decided to leave the topic there. It was a dangerous topic to even consider, especially seeing as Caitrin herself did possess magic, and her temper on the subject had more than once threatened to give her position away. Caitrin therefore instead focussed on the soup in front of her and just took a moment to take in the different smells and sighed softly, herbs were often undervalued in foods stuff but Caitrin valued them completely. She nodded eagerly as Yassia rhymed off which herbs had been used in the soup, and was rather excited when she said she knew something of herbology. “I know quite a bit about herbs myself, but I know mostly which would be good for healing.” That had been one of the things her nurse Helgund had taught her as she had grown up in Mercia. Caitrin was sure elements of magic were used in some of the remedies, so she did not often use them as often as she should. She knew the basics like how to cure a headache, stem bleeding or induce sleep. She also knew of ones which could aid love charms, or produce good fortune, those she stayed well away from at times as they certainly probably used some element of sorcery.

As Caitrin finally began to take in her soup she looked across at her guest. The similarities between them both were quite striking in some ways. For example they were both women of standing who were in a foreign kingdom, and they both had a knowledge of herbs and horses. Caitrin wondered if they had much else in common as these similarities were already quite exciting to Caitrin. However they would probably make themselves known throughout the course of the conversation. As the host Caitrin took it upon herself to spur on a new angle of conversation. “You must have seen many kingdoms during your journey here.” She began, with a slight twinkle in her eyes. Despite the reasons for her friends coming to Camelot, seeing all the different Kingdoms must have been an exciting situation to be in, or at least Caitrin assumed so, “What was it like to see them all? I suppose some must have been more interesting than others?”

Caitrin watched as he placed an arm around her waist, finally she had got some form of physical reaction out of him, despite it only being a minor one. Perhaps it had been forced, in truth Caitrin had no idea, she was still trying to figure Richard out. She smiled up at him, almost encouragingly and slipped a hand around his shoulders and started running her fingers down his back gently. Sometimes the more tender touch worked wonders. “Have you done this before?” She asked casually, watching her hand and then letting her eyes flicker back up to lock in his gaze. Caitrin was serious with her question, it would be interesting and probably amusing to hear his answer.

At his challenge, Caitrin raised her eye brows slightly at him and pressed her lips together. He was really just asking for whatever she gave him now; which wouldn’t be a great deal she imagined. She bit her bottom lip, expecting a further physical reaction from him. He had put his hand around her waist yes, but any fool in the foregate could do that. He puzzled her slightly, perhaps he was just one of those men who found it hard to do anything physically; great. Well this would be something to amuse herself with for the time being anyway until she fully got rid of him. She wasn’t sure how she was going to dispel him from her life just yet but she was working on some form of plan. “As you wish.” She replied gently and inched her head towards his and placed a small kiss at the bottom of his neck. She didn’t go for his lips, well not just yet anyway.

If he were prepared to go any further then he would surely show it now. Caitrin drew back from Richard and shifted out of his rather awkward embrace. Turning back to him, she ran a finger across his cheek and let it linger there for a few moments before giving him a soft wink. She then shifted so that she was behind him and stretched herself out, her head on her pillow and her right leg pushing upwards on the bed as the left one just lay flat on it. She arched her head across to Richard and bither bottom lip, “Do you still want to learn?”

Caitrin felt slightly smug that Griff had admitted that she probably could take care of herself. Not many would agree with him, but it still made her feel relatively proud. Even more so seeing as Griff didn’t know she was a sorceress, and therefore more able to look after herself than most noblewomen in Camelot. She did however have to laugh at his words his presence would probably make a situation a lot better. She nodded but found herself almost consumed in a fit of giggles once more, “But then I would have to defend us both.” She pointed out rather rationally. Caitrin thought men were all taught how to use swords from a very early age, surely she had not come across the one man that was an exception to this?

His shock at how she naturally mounted the horse didn’t go unnoticed. She received that reaction too much. She knew she was supposed to ride to the side of the saddle, but when she rode like that it prevented her from going any faster than a snail’s pace, and where was the fun in that? “What is it?” She asked irritably, she knew what had provoked the reaction he was displaying, but it would be all the more amusing for him to voice it. Her Uncle had once tried to get her out of the habit of riding astride a horse but had failed miserably and since then had left her to it.

Caitrin was now slightly regretting mounting the horse in that fashion as Griff was certainly not being subtle in where his eyes fell. Her cheeks flushed and she ran a hand through her hair, annoyed with her own reactions. She didn’t exactly make a habit of having her legs on show, and she certainly wasn’t going to start now. However for the moment she would have to bear it, and perhaps Griff would remember that he was supposed to be watching where they were going so his eyes would be on the path ahead rather than her hose for most of the journey.

Caitrin pulled a face at Griflet as she picked up the flirtation in his voice. Even though she had to hold onto him for support, she was quite enjoying the sensation, probably more than she should. She didn’t voice that of course as it would just give Griff more cause to be smug and annoying, and she didn’t want to do that now did she? “Oh can you now?” She replied with a grin on her face, “I would like to see how exactly you propose to make this such a regular occurrence.” Now she accompanied her grin with her raised eye brows and left her flirtatious remarks at that. She had however noticed that they weren’t actually moving yet, honestly, she had been serious about getting that letter out of the way as quickly as she could. “Are you able to lead us on? Or do you want me to do it instead?” She teased Griff softly, but hopefully that would either provoke him to start towards the house or give her the reigns, though she knew which one of those was the more likely outcome.

Caitrin could not recall having felt anything like this since she had suffered the miscarriage. It wasn’t like her to sit by herself and to want to be as far away from society as possible. She was usually so good at keeping everything inside. She’d never shown her anguish from being unable to practice her gifts, she’d never told anyone about what had happened in the inn between her and Vortigern and in her general day to day life she could usually pretend nothing was wrong, and that she was her usual stubborn, free spirited self. In this matter however, she just couldn’t pretend to Griff that she was alright because she was anything but.

The silence which followed her words really wasn’t helping and she covered her eyes for a moment with her sleeve, trying to prevent herself dissolving into tears. He knew she wasn’t usually like this, which made it easier to show her emotions to him on this occasion. Griff hadn’t been there when she’d lost the child, no one had. She had never felt so alone than she had in those hours. However, with him now holding her close she knew that he was here now, and that he would understand her grief.

As Griff cupped her face, she locked her glossy eyes with his. His touch was warm and comforting, and it just reiterated the point that he was here now. Caitrin had never, at any point in her life prior to meeting Griff, believed in love, but she was a true convert to the topic. The thoughts of their child, the one she had lost, was still at the forefront of her mind and the fact that she loved Griff as she did made it harder to accept what had happened. She wouldn’t have cared it was out of wedlock, she would have carried the child full term and delivered them into the arms of their father. Of course that was all a distant day dream for her, but she felt safer now that Griff was here too. Nothing could harm her when she was wrapped up in his embrace.

Caitrin faltered as Griff spoke, she went to reply but she just couldn’t find the words. Tears were choking the back of her throat so she pressed her lips together to stop them flooding out. As he pulled her into a full embrace she just let herself fall into it. She moved her hands so that she was hugging his middle and placed her head on his shoulder. She needed this, she just needed some stability and to know that everything was going to be alright. Caitrin buried her head into his shoulder and closed her eyes for a few moments. She had managed to convince herself so wholly that the miscarriage had been her fault that any other explanation was hard to comprehend. Caitrin held him slightly tighter than she probably usually would but she just wanted him to stay there.

Something stirred within the pit of Caitrin’s stomach, and she felt her tears begin to roll down her pale cheeks. Caitrin still had her head buried into Griff’s shoulder so consequently she was slowly dampening the shoulder of his shirt. Her tears weren’t just dedicated to their lost child, they were driven as well by her simple desire to bear a healthy child to complete their family. In reply to his words, Caitrin nodded her head slowly into his shoulder. She knew she could not have prevented the miscarriage, at the back of her mind she knew it was not her fault, but that didn’t stop her being upset about it. After some time of them sitting in silence Caitrin finally cleared her throat, though tears were still rolling down her cheeks. “It was our child.” She whispered rather helplessly, she wasn’t even sure why she was saying it. Perhaps she was just trying to justify her grief to them both, and with a hint of fear in her voice and features she continued, “What if I can’t bear children anymore?”

Caitrin, though she had never understood why her father and brothers lusted for war as much as they did, had never seen it as being anything other than normal. She had expected Camelot to be the same, if not worse. It seemed you could only appreciate how foreign your upbringing seemed to another once you had changed kingdoms and spoken to the people there. She wished now that she had been sent to live with her Uncle when she was a child, perhaps the world would have seemed less cruel in her eyes. However, she supposed she could not change what had already been, and she was out of Mercia now and that was all that mattered to Caitrin.

Caitrin wondered if Uther was thinking of someone in particular, but she decided not to ask as she would not want to meet whoever it was anyway. Or at least she hoped she never would anyway. She often thought her father could have been a lot more quick witted, like her Uncle, if he had not spent his time being in such a war like mind set.

Rouland was content with the King’s words, about his hope for bringing Caitrin into the Camelot way of life went well. Rouland was sure it would, after all there was no reason why Caitrin should not be happy in Camelot was there? She was only young and still had quite a lot to learn before she blossomed into womanhood, and he could help her along the way in ways her father had been simply unable to. He was after all rather unsuited to anything aside from being on the battlefield. “I am sure the Prince will help as well once Caitrin has the pleasure of being acquainted with him.”

Caitin also hoped that her transition into woman hood would go smoothly and well. She wanted to make as good an impression as possible, she didn’t want to be shoved to the side like she had done in Mercia. Here, she wanted to stand up from the crowd. “I hope you will watch my progress through the next few years sire.” Caitrin then said rather brightly and looked across at her Uncle who smiled back at her as well.

Caitrin remembered the events from Baynard's visit all too well. Her Uncle had been furious at the proceedings and had let Arthur know his exact feelings on the matter. Of course Caitrin had wanted to make her feelings known to Arthur as well but her Uncle had sent her back to the horses before she could crash the meeting. "I have only been to a few places myself." Caitrin said softly, "Here, Mercia and Sorelia." Of course her visit to the latter place she wanted to swiftly forget. She preferred it here in Camelot and she wanted to remain here to live out her days.

Getting any information out of Merlin seemed to be like drawing blood from a stone. It was simply an impossible task. She sighed slightly and cocked her head to the side, "Fine, I shall ask Arthur next time I see him what exactly you have been up to." Perhaps that would tempt him to tell her. She was sure he would rather tell her than let it fall to Arthur to enlighten the young noblewoman.

She nodded at the history he gave her. It seemed like a simple enough life. Caitrin had figured he had not been born into servitude as he was far too outspoken for that to be a possibility. Caitrin could not help but laugh as he asked her if she had always been a noblewoman, but his latter comment distracted her somewhat. "Oh I live with my Uncle in Camelot." She put in quickly, she supposed she had not been exactly clear when she had been explaining about her background before. Perhaps now she could offer Merlin more clarity. "I was born and raised in Mercia, but my father sent me to live with my Uncle in Camelot a few years ago." She shrugged softly as if it were nothing, but it was quite the opposite. By coming to Cameot she had had to deny her magic, but she had saved herself from another arranged marriage, and that was enough to make the sacrifice.

Caitrin looked over at the landscape which Yassia was describing and found an almost new interest in her surroundings forming. She knew she took the view from her Uncle’s house for granted, but until now it had not occurred to her just how much she had taken it for granted. Camelot’s scenery was quite different to that which she had been used to in Mercia. There the landscape was much rockier, whereas in Camelot the hills were green rather than grey. “I think I prefer the landscape here to Mercia.” Caitrin mused softly and gave a quick smile; she did not miss Mercia one jot, and this was one of the reasons why she did not.

Terrell was indeed quite a fitting name for a horse with a stubborn temperament, it was quite unique as well as it could be a unisex name. Of course the name it derived from was Tyrrel, which was a masculine name. Caitrin was quite proud as Yassia declared that she liked the name enough to introduce it to the mare. She also beamed at the fact Yassia called her a friend, it was quite a big thing to Caitrin as she was not particularly close to many women courtiers. She could not hide her pride at having helped Yassia find a name for her horse. It was quite refreshing to find someone who shared her views that horses did indeed have their unique personality, and should therefore have a name to match it. “Then whenever you take Terrell out for a ride you shall think of our friendship.” Caitrin declared rather boldly and hoped that Yassia would indeed look upon this evening with fondness.

As Yassia took up what could only be described as quite a smug stance, Caitrin grinned back at her, copying her action in leaning back slightly. It had not been a straightforward courting for her or Griff, but they were both so unlike the common courtier then of course they had done things a little unconventionally. She was not surprised Yassia had not heard of him, she and Griflet were rarely seen at court individually any more so as Yassia had already met her the other night, it was unlikely she would have already met Griff. “Well then I shall add him to the list of those I must introduce you to.” Of course Griflet would be a breath of fresh air for her friend if she had just met Caitrin’s Uncle Rouland as he was quite cynical, and Griff was the complete opposite of him.

Caitrin nodded rather proudly at the fact her Uncle knew about her and Griflet, and that it was indeed a serious relationship. Of course her Uncle Rouland had managed to discover them catching a few moments in each others company in the gardens in Camelot and had never let her forget it since. That all seemed like such a long time ago. Griflet was round most of the time, and Rouland had near enough resided himself that he would be around for a lot longer so had learnt to put up with him. “My Uncle knows; yes. I’ve known Griff for oh, nearly a year now so I believe it is rather serious.” She had met him not long after she had recovered from the dragon attack and he had been by her side for most of the time since. She hadn’t ever meant it to get this serious, but they had just clicked, and that was the end of that.

She waved away Yassia’s apology, as it really was not needed. Caitrin knew she should not be so sensitive to even hearing anything to do with magic, but as she was so much in society she was rather paranoid about sorcery. Of course most of that was to do with the fact that Caitrin herself possessed sorcery, and she knew the penalty if she were ever caught so she was always on her toes, trying to cover her traces lest she become associated with sorcery. “I don’t no,” Caitrin smiled at her guest and felt rather embarrassed, “I am sorry about my reaction, sorcery is very rarely seen in a good way in Camelot.” Of course Caitrin could only feel anger that this was the case. She had the gift of sorcery and was forced to hide it because of the paranoid King. Her kind was persecuted mercilessly, and yet everyone in Camelot seemed to think it was normal practice. However, Caitrin did not voice any of this, she rather liked her head attached to her shoulders too much to suggest Uther was wrong in his views.

Now that Yassia mentioned it, Caitrin realised she had no idea what they were being served for dinner. She sometimes did ask the cook her Uncle kept to prepare certain meals, but tonight she had just asked for his fine taste to dictate the menu. She shrugged softly but let a small laugh escape her lips, she felt a bit daft playing host to a menu she had no idea about. “I suppose it shall be a surprise for both of us.” Two servants, as if on cue, bustled in holding two bowls, setting one down in front of Yassia before setting one down in front of Caitrin. The smell of the soup which both women had been given was sensational! Of course it was only a starter, and Caitrin recognised that it was a herb soup; one of her favourites! She only hoped that Yassia shared her love for it. Picking up her spoon to tuck into her food she urged Yassia to do the same, “I hope you enjoy it, for it is one of my favourite dishes.”

The silence at her earlier words of being glad to be free of Morgana’s rule was appreciated. She did not want to think about the past few weeks at all, the whole thing had been incredibly unpleasant and even she had feared for her life on more than one occasion. Of course she’d never lost faith in Arthur, or the Knights of Camelot; she knew they would come back to liberate them all from Morgana’s reign.

Caitrin noticed Guinevère’s shock but ignored it for the most part. Telling of an engagement was quite intimate information to one who had only just become an acquaintance, but the ring was plain enough on her hand to show that she had indeed given herself to just one man. The engagement had been rather shrouded by the chaos that Morgana’s rule had brought, as they had been engaged not long before Morgana was proclaimed Queen. “Thank you.” Caitrin smiled warmly as she truly meant it.

Caitrin did not look back to Arthur, but as she continued to focus her attentions on Guinevère she wondered if she made Arthur as happy as Griflet made her. She would want nothing else for her friend, and almost felt slightly protective over him in this matter.

Whenever she thought of her fiancé, Griflet, annoyingly she could not help a smile warming her lips. A few years ago she would have thought it impossible for any man to warm her heart, but now things were quite different. She had been so certain as a young girl that she would never fall in love, but she supposed that sometimes in life you could not help which way you fell. Caitrin was happy, and she was sure Griflet was happy too and that was all that really mattered at the end of the day wasn’t it? “His name is Griflet Aubert, he is Sir Lucan’s brother.” Lucan of course being one of the Knight’s of Camelot. Caitrin had felt sick when she had learned of his imprisonment at Morgana’s hands, she didn’t even want to consider what would have happened to Lucan if Arthur had not returned when he had. “I have known him for a while now, but it feels as if I have known him for much longer.” She gave another wide smile, it had been just under two years since she had been introduced to Griflet but it did not feel like they were particularly rushing things. They were engaged yes, but neither had spoken of dates or guests yet, they were just taking things as they came which was advisable given the past few weeks events.

Caitrin was not fazed by Yassia’s surprise at her having heard of Ailantha. Not many noblewomen were as educated as she was, and it was something she took pride in. From a young age she had often felt the urge to pursue her interests, and to learn about the world around her. Helgund had been her biggest help in this respect, not only had she taught her magic, she’d taught her of geography, history and even literature; though the latter was socially acceptable for ladies of standing to learn to an extent. Her sisters had been typical noblewomen, and had prided themselves on nothing more than a new dress and the perfect hair to match it. Caitrin had never quite understood their philosophy, and how they could be so uninterested in the world around them. “I was taught a little about geography, although I imagined all the places were made up when I was a child because they seemed so far away.” She gave a small smile, and found Yassia to be in a similar mindset. “Albion is a beautiful place to reside, though I suppose I have nothing to compare it with.” She then said, in reply to Yassia’s comments about Albion being similar to a fairy tale to her.

Ah, a knight of Camelot. Perhaps that was why Caitrin had not heard of him, apart from Arthur she did not mix with many of the knights. She had nothing against them, she just didn’t move in that social circle at court. There was nothing wrong with that though she supposed, and perhaps now she would make the effort to become acquainted with Yassia’s Uncle at court. “I shall look out for him when I am next at court.” Which in truth would not be that long, as Caitrin was never far away from court if she could help it. Court life was one which she could now not imagine living without, it felt empowering to be at the hub of society mixing with other noble families all the time. “I shall have to aquaint you with my Uncle, Lord Rouland, as well at some point. He was not at the feast I met you at, he is in fact very rarely at court.” Her Uncle hated court life, there were no two ways about it. He much preferred being left alone in his estates, and he could not see why he should change his ways now.

As Yassia complimented Lily’s name Caitrin beamed with a sense of pride. She had picked out the name quite carefully when she had first been given the mare. Her Uncle could not see the point in naming horses, but Caitrin could. They all had their individual personalities, and therefore they should all have their well chosen names. Lily had gained her name because she had quite a delicate nature, however, she could ride hard through the valleys and she never failed Caitrin for a ride out in the forests. “Thank you, and yes of course I will help you choose a name for your mount, tell me something of its temperament and then perhaps I can help you.” There was something in the way that Yassia said her mount had been lost in an accident that made Caitrin slightly suspicious. She knew she probably shouldn’t ask, but she found herself quite curious, “What happened?” Perhaps that could be a story saved for dinner, well, if it was even worth telling. Caitrin had lost two mounts in her time, one had been taken by bandits when that idiot man had stopped her on the roads. She blinked, no, she wasn’t going to let thoughts of him ruin her evening with Yassia. The second horse had been lost after it had thrown her off its back, though Caitrin was glad as that particular mount had never had a particularly good temperament.

Caitrin bit her lip slightly awkwardly, she was supposed to be making Yassia feel better, but instead she seemed to just be making things worse. She shuffled slightly as Yassia mentioned losing her stepbrother and felt truly sorry for her loss. Caitrin had never been in the position of losing a sibling, but as her family was not close she was unsure of the effect it would have. “I’m sorry.” She offered rather weakly, and took it upon herself to not inquire into Yassia’s journey anymore. Well, for the time being at least.

As Yassia spoke, Caitrin found herself nodding in agreement. After all, all that she said was true. The reason she had so few happy memories of her time in Mercia had not been because she lived in a horrible place, but it was because her family had been so irritating and they had never understood her, and what she was truly capable of. But here, in her Uncle’s home, she could go from room to room and remember jests she had made with her Uncle, guests she had invited round and of course the odd night spent with Griflet with them just watching the hours melt away with each other. “It’s true, and there are a lot more people who make this house special than in my last home.” It was a fairly vague comment, but it was not intended as such. Caitrin would certainly not be offended if Yassia asked her more, but again, perhaps this was something for over dinner.

Caitrin returned to her guest with a goblet full of wine, and set herself down again in the chair closest to Yassia. She hoped dinner would not be too long off as she was already quite hungry. However, the present company was doing a good job at keeping her mind off her rumbling stomach. “I am glad you feel welcome here, as that was my intention.” She smiled and raised her goblet slightly at Yassia’s latter words and took a small swig from it; only then hoping her Uncle would not miss the wine they were drinking. “And a good time we shall have.” Caitrin was sure they would both enjoy themselves, why wouldn’t they?

The wine hit the back of her throat with a small bitter prickle and she breathed out slowly, now truly feeling relaxed. If Yassia felt welcomed already then Caitrin’s skills as a hostess could not be all bad. That gave her some encouragement at least. “I do not think it will be too long until dinner is served, or at least I hope not anyway.”

Notes: I apologise these posts keep getting longer and longer xD