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Post by kinguthersqueen on Jan 5, 2011 0:02:31 GMT -5
Uther felt to a point like throwing her out. He really did want to be left alone. He knew, though, that if there was a chance to speak to Arthur again, he should probably take it. He knew also that he had to keep up appearances. He wanted nothing more than to stay in here, alone, away from the troubles that hounded him from the outside world. But he was king, and he had to show that he was still capable of running his kingdom and that he was not an invalid.
He wanted to say more to her, eyed her as thoughts filtered through his mind. He knew good and well that what had occured between her and Arthur wasn't any enchantment. Arthur had kept silent, likely because he didn't think his father would accept. He wanted to ask her and get the truth one and for all, but he had to speak carefully so as not to have her go back to Arthur and get the prince angry.
"yes, perhaps." He wasn't looking forward to what might occur if the new knjights were among those who joined them, but perhaps it would also quiet Arthur's fears for a while at least. ]"It may be a wise thing, given the recent additions to our force. There is still much tension, however."His expression said that it wasn't just the knights causing it.
"I have suspicions. Arthur says nothing, but I am not blind. I should, by rights, banish you, but I cannot afford to alienate Arthur completely. If you leave, so will he, and I cannot lose him. I cannot accept things as they are, but if I do not act rashly, perhaps the future will bring differences. Arthur has experienced feelings before and they have passed. Perhaps it will happen again."
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Jan 3, 2011 0:14:40 GMT -5
Uther knew he was repeating words a lot at the moment, but he wasn't in a mood to think clearly right now. He was victim, as so often before, to his raging temper and his attempts to resist her tries to get on his nerves. She was probably enjoying this even more than she was showing, which would mean a great deal, and was doing everything she could to make him more angry. He was helpless and captive, and she was squeezing as much entertainment out of it as she could.
"And what exactly *could* I do while trapped down here? I cannot exactly free myself, otherwise I would have long ago, obviously."he replied."Tell me, what is it you are insinuating with those words?"
He hated her taunts about Arthur with a passion, and he couldn't help it if angered him and made him repeat his words. He was not going to let himself think any differently than he'd said."Arthur is ALIVE!"he growled, worked up but not wanting to scream anymore. His throat was raw from it, and it was pointless when Nimueh was involved.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Jan 2, 2011 18:14:26 GMT -5
Uther did realize he was in little position to talk about shame. He could see Arthur was getting angry about it, and wondered if they would ever come to agreement on these kinds of things. Uther was a man bound by tradition, unable to deal with the changes being foisted on him. It was the same sort of battle that had likely been fought since the beginning of time and would be fought long after they were mere legends and stories.
He sighed, hoping he could quiet Arthur's anger, at least for the time being.
"I know I may find myself labled a hypocrite if I am not cautious. I can only say that I am sorry things could not have been differently...and as you said, we must focus on the future." he replied.
"That is why I choose not to argue your decision, for the time being. I may not agree with it fully, but I do not want to simply cast it aside. I could, with a few words, as you know, but I would prefer not to drive you away irreperably. So, I shall be keeping an eye on them, but I will not order their titles stripped. It is difficult to change one's tradtions, one's ideals...what has been said time and time again since I was a boy...what was law in the kingdom of my father and my father's father, even though they did not rule Camelot. I do not know if I can ever alter my own thinking, even though I know that you likely will change some of my laws after I am gone."
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 29, 2010 16:54:13 GMT -5
Uther was trying to keep a confident face, to enjoy the party as much as possible and convince the nobles and dignitaries that he was all right. The king's birthday celebration was always celebrated with a lavish party, expensive gifts,feasting and a lot of nobles, both from Camelot and from its allies. Uther knew this was a chance to show that things were back to normal in Camelot, but he still felt sadness at Morgana's absence. No one spoke of it much, but some did offer words of sadness at what had happened and gladness that Uther was in better health now.
Uther was keeping an eye on Gwen and Arthur and the new knights, and he was very alert for potential danger, the guards ordered to be on high alert. He still worried almost constantly about what Morgana and Morgause might attempt to do and others would probably say he was even more paranoid than he used to be. Still, he socialized as much as he could bring himself to, and did try to allow himself just a few brief moments of relaxation.
"People of Camelot, I wish to welcome you all to this celebration." he said as he addressed the gathered crowd."I hope that you will view this not only as a birthday celebration, but as a celebration of Camelot's resilience in the face of attempts by its enemies to destroy its safety and security. We are of course devastated by the actions of the Lady Morgana, but it is my hope that it will still prove the result of sorcery, and that one day she might still return to us, free and well again. But, for now, let us use this time as a period of relaxation and celebration and a time to know that hope still remains that we will persevere against those who seek to ruin us."
Open post is wide open. Anyone can attend
It can be set any time between the end of the last season and the start of s4, since we have no idea when Uther's birthday really is. (sometimes when I do a bio I use ASH's but I forget when his is)
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 29, 2010 0:51:38 GMT -5
His mind was still basically warring with itself. He wanted to be more responsive, wanted to stop staying holed up, but it wasn't easy to do so. He was saddened and uneasy, still often wondering what really mattered anymore. He did not want to appear weak, but it was difficult to talk himself into moving about. He knew he couldn't stay in here forever, though. He had to push himself, go on even if he didn't feel like it.
He also couldn't help thinking of Arthur when he saw Gwen. He knew there was still something going on, even though neither showed any sign of it around him. He was not willing to argue it with Arthur, he knew the pripnce wouldn't yield and he'd only alienate himself from Arthur further if he did. So, though he still didn't approve, he kept quiet about it, not bringing it up for the time being. Better to be careful and not make Arthur angrier than he already was.
"Perhaps I will. I will give it some thought." He knew that things would still be tense with Arthur, but he was willing to be civil, to see if he could speak to him a bit more. He only hoped that the meal did not end in an arguement.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 28, 2010 0:51:53 GMT -5
Uther wasn't able to shake a feeling of unease, just for a moment, but he tried to push it aside. It would not be proper to voice anything or make displeasure known in any way, but he did know when there was something he just didn't like about a person, something that told him he should keep his guard up and keep an eye on them. He nodded as she spoke, noting the tone of her words. She was not showing any ill intent in them, but he had no way of knowing if she was sincere or not.
He saw the look in the eyes of Delilah's daughter as she glanced at him, and he could tell that she was a bit uneasy as well, that perhaps she was wanting to tell him something. He made no move to speak to her, but there was something in his eyes that said he was watching the situation closely, and that any threats would be swiftly dealt with. He would hear her if she chose to come to him later, but if not, he might have to initiate a discussion, just to further assure himself that he was not in any danger.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 24, 2010 2:05:30 GMT -5
Uther knew that Nimueh was right about him being blind to Morgana, but he would never admit it. He had cared so much for her and wanted so much to help her that he had blinded himself to what she had become. He should have seen her unraveling, growing darker, becoming more hateful toward him, but he hadn't. He didn't answer Nimueh's words, just seethed with anger, his sides heaving.
Her continued insistance on tormenting him with talk of Arthur's death only made the situation even worse. It made him start fighting and straining again, growling and wanting to tackle her, useless though it would have been.
"I WILL NOT ACCEPT IT! UNLESS HIS BODY IS BROUGHT TO ME, I WILL NOT BELIEVE HE IS DEAD!"he roared. It was agitating the guards, but he didn't care at this point.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 23, 2010 2:11:37 GMT -5
Uther knew that Arthur's words were true, even if he would never admit it. He really did not know how the stigma and shame would have been overcome, though, and he was too stubborn to admit he might have been wrong on that aspect. He still felt he had been doing what was necessary for the sake of the kingdom, but he chose not to argue it, since Arthur was not pushing him about it.
"Yes, that is the question...I don't understand. I will not get past it. All that can be hoped for is that she is not lost forever. I have given her so much. She returns it this way. It pains me."
Uther honestly had intended the secret to die with him. He had made Gaius promise the same thing. It would have been so if Morgana had not heard him. He could not bring himself to answer in words, but his answer was clear in his eyes, which did not meet his son's gaze.
He did not choose to argue now about the knights. It was not unheard of for bravery to be rewarded in such a way, but it was quite rare. More importantly, he did not want to have Arthur estranged from him completely. Right now, too much arguing ran that risk. He was too stubborn to simply accept them, but he felt he could pacify Arthur for now, until he was stronger and thinking more clearly again.
" I do not wish to argue at the moment. I will just say that any shame or trouble they bring is of your fault. I hope your instincts prove true. Camelot does not need more shame."
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 23, 2010 0:51:15 GMT -5
Uther was still in a sort of automatic mode, or at least it would be called such if the word had been used back then. He responded when asked; he ate when the food was brought, he let his servant bathe and dress him, and let Gaius dress and treat his injuries. It was rare, though, for him to take initiative for much of anything. He couldn't yet pull himself out of the daze, the sort of fog his mind was in.
He'd fallen into a fitful sleep, but Gwen's arrival woke him up quickly. He was a bit surprised that it was her instead of his manservant, but at the same time,something about it didn't surprise him. She was probably doing it for Arthur; he knew it was not an enchantment by now. He just didn't feel like doing anything that would estrange Arthur from him completely, so he refrained from making his annoyance known while clinging to the hope that it might still pass and Arthur would come to his senses. He also knew she still harbored resentment over her father's death, necessary though it was.
He spoke little, though some of the swelling of his tongue was finally going down. It was his nature with the servants anyway, he preferred them to do their jobs and not talk too much. He did give a nod, though, and muttered a bit about being startled.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 12, 2010 17:37:38 GMT -5
Uther was still holding his head high, but he knew he presented a less than intimdating picture right now. It was difficult to keep fighting when so much was happening around him and he could not stop it. He had tried to keep his proud look and confident demeanor, but it seemed to matter little most of the time. Especially when neither Morgana nor Nimueh was seeing through it. He listened as she spoke, her words hitting sore spots as usual. He HAD been blind, much as he hated to admit it.
"There was no way I could know. She was an excellent deciever."he replied. He would never admit that he had been blind to her, it would be too humiliating."It would not surprise me. You will look for any means to take me down and destroy me."
Uther did not want to admit she was right about Arthur, but he knew it was a real possibility. But he would never admit that to her. He could not allow himself to think that way.
"I WILL NOT BELIEVE IT!" he roared, lunging and straining at his bonds."NOT UNTIL I HAVE PROOF. UNTIL I SEE HIS BODY, I WILL NOT ACCEPT THAT HE IS DEAD!
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 11, 2010 2:11:59 GMT -5
He was, in truth, struggling to comprehend Arthur's words and reasons, his mind still working its way through the numb shock he'd been in since they freed him. He was fighting to keep cognant and pay attention, and his mind kept wanting to retreat, to withdraw and shut the world out again. He focused on his son's words, knowing how true they were and yet how impossible. He'd been in a situation that had no easy way out. He could only hope his son would understand in time, after he'd had time to absorb all of the information and think through things."I did what I felt was necessary. Not because of my pride, for the good of the kingdom. I feared the mockery might lead to attacks. And, as I said, I feared this...feared Morgana becoming queen. Perhaps she is too like me. I did not want to hurt you. Either of you. Perhaps it should have been different. But I thought it was the only way. I cannot change it now...can only deal with the consequences." he said. Uther was not a man to admit being wrong, and that was well known by now.
And Uther was also pleaed at Arthur's agreement about not killing Morgana. He would never have been able to shed her blood or see Arthur shed it. It saddened him to know that things were forever changed, but at least she would have her life."Their service is appreciated. They knew they risked death, but they fought. They should be rewarded, at least."The king was at least willing to admit that much, if not to say he accepted them as knights yet. |
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 10, 2010 1:43:49 GMT -5
Uther was the kind of man, though, who only fought more when told not to fight. He'd keep struggling until he *was* hurt or dead before he'd give up and submit to her. And when she started using that tone of hers with him, it did indeed make him fight her even more. He could have taken her quite easily, but she was using magic against him and he hated the fact that it was leaving him at a disadvantage. He could see the guards as they kept looking in, but he could only tell them there was little they could do. It wasn't like they could actually restrain her. And that was what really annoyed him, that she could do these things to him and he was helpless to get rid of her.
He became even more furious when she locked her hands around his wrists with magic, and they were deadlocked for a few moments, staring each other in the eyes, before Uther started fighting against her again.He knew it was useless, and it didn't last long, but what was annoying him now was that she was almost looking like she was trying to seduce him or something. He sighed, exasperated with her.
"That, I suppose, is the question." came the reply. "You seem to enjoy dominating me. I'm not entirely pleased."He might hate her but he was still a human male, and he didn't like the assorted other sensations she was sending through him right now, either.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 8, 2010 20:23:15 GMT -5
He still spent a great deal of time in bed, naturally, because every time he tried sitting in a chair, his back hurt and forced him back to bed after a short time. He was still often heard crying when he was in his chambers alone. He had terrible nightmares and slept most nights with help from one of Gaius's draughts. The haunted, defeated look in his eyes rarely left, and although he fought to hold to his sanity, it wasn't easy.
He often barely even looked up when someone came in, caught up in thought again about Morgana and not noticing. He could not let go of her, could not stop think of her, no matter how much time passed, and he knew it. She would haunt his thoughts forever. |
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 6, 2010 17:19:38 GMT -5
Uther heard the call, but did not immediately raise his head to look, remaining quiet in the dazed, shocked silence he'd been in since he'd been brought down here. He was far past struggling and fighting, he was exhausted from it and his wrists were bloodied and raw from the chafing of the chains. He finally raised his head to meet Gwen, the same look of horror and pain in his eyes that had was now a constant. He shook his head when he saw the tray.
"I will not eat. I will starve if it frees me from this." Lowering his voice to a whisper, he said"Is there no way you can free me Help me to escape from here?"
He knew it was impossible, no rational person would think otherwise. But if he died fighting his way to freedom, it was a better death than being tortured to death in here, dying in pain and humiliation. He would at least die a warrior's death if that were to happen.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 6, 2010 16:56:07 GMT -5
Uther had drifted into a light doze, but Arthur's footsteps jerked him awake with a start. He winced, the sudden movement hurting his injuries. He moved his head slightly, glancing briefly at Arthur but not able yet to meet his son's gaze. He spoke slowly, his speech still distorted by his swollen, painful tongue. Even eating was still a painful ordeal, despite Gaius's medicines."I'll recover...will take time. I don't give up easily. I am relieved for you...feared for you. I am proud. You did well."Uther had to chose his words carefully. He did not want to show weakness or vulnerability if he could avoid it. He had to be strong as much as possible, though the redness of his eyes probably belied some of his true condition. He felt badly for hurting Arthur and lying to him, he just wished Arthur could understand his position. He wasn't the only king to have an affair or an illegitimate child, but like any other ruler with a desire to protect his kingdom, he'd had to keep it quiet. Vivian had never told anyone, it had been Gorlois who was the first problem. Uther had grieved his death, but he'd had little choice but to have him killed when he began questioning Morgana's parentage."I have no words about Morgana...none to speak. I wanted to tell...had to protect my kingdom. We would have been shamed. I would have been humiliated. It was a difficult position. No easy answer. No matter what choice I made, it was a difficult one. I had to make the choice that was best for all of Camelot. I never wanted to cause you or Morgana pain. I also feared if she knew, she might act against you...just as she did. Might harm you. I wanted to protect you. I think now that perhaps I saw myself in her...and that made me fear her."
I can promise this: I was not unfaithful to Ygraine. She was everything. Nothing could make me betray her. I can only hope now that things will change...that Morgana will see...before it is too late. I do not want to believe she is beyond help...beyond hope. But she cannot return to what was. If she is found, she will be banished. Or I may confine her to the dungeons for the rest of her life. What was, is now gone. But I will not kill her...not my own daughter. That I know."He had to rest, and so he lower his head back to the pillow. It wasn't that he was too weak, it was mainly that he had to rest his wounded tongue. There was a lot on his face and in his eyes that he could not, did not speak-pain,exhaustion,devastation...the effect of all that had happened was harsh, and it was obvious to see.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 5, 2010 16:51:47 GMT -5
Uther rather felt like he was being tortured some more. Being chained down here was bad enough, but now he had to listen to her going on and on again. And like before, he couldn't call the guards, only now it was for a very different reason. He sat down, panting, not wanting to expend any more energy. He hadn't eaten since being brought here, he'd refused. He'd starve first. But he was beginning to get weak, and the more he thrashed around, the more tired he felt. And he knew she wasn't foolish enough to come within range, magic or no.
"I feel that if she planned on killing me outright, it would have happened long ago. She probably takes the same delight you do in torturing me. She is so much like me that it's frightening. It's rather surprising you haven't made some form of alliance with her yet, you're seemingly so much of like mind."
She was standing right in front of him now, just beyond the reach of his chained arms. He lunged again, once, then settled, crouching, knowing it was pointless. But her words were enraging him, and he did not care who heard him yell.
"MY SON IS STILL ALIVE! He will die before he surrenders! He will fight for Camelot until his last breath!
But inside, Uther knew that even Arthur would need a miracle. One man or even one man with a band of rebels, if anyone was helping him, could not defeat an immortal army. Uther refused, though, to give up hope altogether, no matter what anyone told him. He would not give up as long as hope remained that his son was alive.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 4, 2010 20:48:52 GMT -5
He had fully expected to die by Morgana's hand, but they had preferred to keep him alive as a pet, a plaything. Besides the beatings,the floggings and the burns, they had slammed him with magic, making his pain far worse than it would have been on its own. Several times he'd been doused with cold salt water. His only relief was that it had not gone beyond physical and psychological, to anything more invasive. He knew they'd most likely intended to have their fun and torture him until he died from it, simply so he'd suffer more.
He could not handle a lot of food yet, but ate slowly from a plate of light items-fruit and bread-and a bowl of soup, plus a goblet of wine. He had refused to eat while imprisoned, and was very weak from it, but he knew better than to eat too much too quickly. He had little appetite, however, he was too saddened to eat much, too distraught over what had happened.
Gaius had given him something for the pain and had left a sleeping draught but UTher did not want it yet, he did not think he could handle sleep just yet, much as he desperately needed it. He could see the horrors in his eyes every time he shut them, and he knew he would be trapped in the nightmares that plagued him if he took the draught now. Besides, he needed to convince his son to speak to him.
Arthur was angry, and he understood that-it would take a long time to regain trust and move past what had happened, the mistakes he'd made. He wished there was something he coud say, some words he could speak, to make it better, but forgiveness would not be that easy. Mending the distance would take months, perhaps, and Arthur would need time to calm down and think more rationally. Uther couldn't change the lies about Morgana, he could only figure out a way to move forward.
Uther himself was saddened over MOrgana's actions, and couldn't help feeling he had caused it. He put on a strong front when anyone was around, but when he was alone, he couldn't stop the tears that stung his eyes and the sobs that racked his form. Morgana was lost to him now, and he knew it. Even if she was found, though he could not bring himself to kill her, he would be forced to banish her. He hoped she would be redeemed one day, that she would see the truth, but until then, all was lost.
Uther thought much of the knights Arthur had made, and of the servant girl. He could not easily dismiss them, both becuase of their service to him, and because it would anger his son further. He struggled to reconcile those facts with the knight's code and his own sense of honor. He struggled to accept Arthur's feelings for the servant girl. He was not certain what he would eventually say or what he would do about them, not yet.
Uther had managed to escape alive, and he knew he was fortunate. But deep inside, he wondered just how alive he truly still was. He felt much as he had after the loss of Ygraine, that part of him was already dead. He had lost his wife and had lost his daughter not once but twice. Morgana still lived, but he had little hope of seeing her again, and her days as his ward were over.
And he could well still lose his son to him, if he could not repair the damage somehow. He had Arthur summoned to come to him as soon as possible,and now he waited, knowing it would likely not go well. He could only hope that there were not too many angry words explained, and that even if things were still tense, they could still remain civil with each other. |
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 3, 2010 1:58:32 GMT -5
Uther hadn't been willing to lose Morgana again. Not after so recently getting her back safe and being able to know that she was alive after three months of uncertainty. He didn't know how the incident had happened, but the injury had been grievous and she'd been certain to die, according to Gaius. It was not something Uther would accept willingly.
He knew that his order to use magic if necessary made him a hypocrite, and he didn't care. No one outside of he and Gaius would ever know, and he would not stand by and watch Morgana die. He would do whatever it took to save her, just as he would have when Arthur lay dying. He had been so depserate that he ahd opened up to Gaius about the truth, even though he had intended to carry that secret to his death.
It had not been something he'd wanted to happen, and he'd known that allowing Vivian to seek comfort with him was wrong, but he had been unable to stop what had happened. Gorlois never questioned whether or not she was his until she was ten years old. Uther had been pained at having to arrange his friend's demise, but he was too aware of the scandal that would arise if his secret were discovered.
And, much as he would like to have told Morgana the truth, he kept it from her for the same reason. Besides, he feared her, even though he would never admit it, and feared what she might do to Arthur. She was so much like him that it frightened him at times. He recalled telling her at Gorlois's grave what she had inherited from her father, and though she had thought he spoke of Gorlois, he really spoke of himself.
Uther did not know how, but Gaius had been able to help her, and she was alive and healing. He'd been anxious to talk with her and make sure she was okay. That was why he now came to her room, gently knocking and nudging the door open, looking in to see how she was doing now.
"I do not have words to express how frightened I was...I thought I would lose you, and I could not bear that, not after fearing I'd lost you before."he said.
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 3, 2010 1:34:47 GMT -5
Uther felt as though a burden had been lifted from him when he had been told that Morgana had been found and was coming home, safe and alive. For months he had searched for her, greatly fearing what might have happened to her and if she was even alive. She had been ill and near death when her sister had taken her, and the king had felt himself going nearly insane from worry about her.
Now, she was back in the castle, and he had been able to greet her and hold her and know that she was physically there, that she was really back. No one would ever know the real truth of why he cared so deeply for her, but he knew that all of Camelot would be happy that she was safe. She seemed uninjured, which ws fortunate, but she had obviously been through much during her absence.
Uther was eager to speak to her more extensively after she had taken care of her immediate needs, and he knocked on the door to her room, waiting for her to answer.
When: During Tears of Uther Pendragon 1
Who: Tag Morgana
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Post by kinguthersqueen on Dec 2, 2010 20:50:37 GMT -5
Uther expected Nimueh's repeated chattering and insults. She could keep going for a long time, even though she knew as well as he did that he would never stoop to admitting any wrongdoing. He would have tuned her out, but she was rather hard to ignore at the moment, being so close to him and so insistant.
"It is not that fragile. I have enough supporters on my side to keep the peace. And I do not question Gaius's loyalty, at least now. I cannot change what has already happened." He was of course referring to the Witchfinder's visit and his nearly executing Gaius. Of course, there was also the case of Edwin, but Uther had mended tings well with Gaius afterward. He was often surprised, though, that Gaius did remain loyal; so many others would have abandoned him long ago.
He became more enraged when she used magic on him, rolling over onto his belly to stop the pain in his spine, growling and yelling as he did. But he quickly returned to his previous position, not wishing to give NImueh any chance to make remarks about kneeling before her. HIs anger got him lashing out at her again, even though he knew rationally it was useless.
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